


When Sinners Repent (Old Version)

by Galaxy_of_Legends



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Armitage Hux Has Feelings, Enemies to Lovers, Force-Sensitive Armitage Hux, Force-Sensitive Finn (Star Wars), Forgiveness, How Do I Tag, M/M, Minor Poe Dameron/Finn, Not Canon Compliant, Original Character(s), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Canon Fix-It, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Redeemed Ben Solo, Redemption, Slow Burn, Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Spoilers, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-07-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:41:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 37,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22080496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Galaxy_of_Legends/pseuds/Galaxy_of_Legends
Summary: NOTE: this is an outdated, abandoned work. I am in the process of rewriting and continuing this fic, which you can find under my profile. Read the last chapter of this work for a better explanation. Thanks!Armitage Hux survived Pryde's execution attempt, but his place within the First Order did not. With nothing left to lose and grudges to settle, he has yet to discover where his fate lies.This story explores an ending and beyond in which both Hux and Ben Solo survive, and join the resistance. In the wake of Palpatine's destruction, how will they face their pasts, futures, and each other?
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Armitage Hux/Kylo Ren, Poe Dameron/Finn
Comments: 96
Kudos: 328





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! This is my very first fic and I'm excited to share this story with everyone else who thought Ben and Armitage deserved better. Please feel free to comment with your thoughts, corrections in spelling/grammar, and constructive criticism! Thanks for reading.

A lone cargo freighter sailed amongst the stars and onyx sea of space. The ship was almost dark enough to blend in, and the markings on its hull made it unmistakably of the First Order. The cargo compartment on the freighter was barely lit, with only some rays seeping through the cracks in the door to the cockpit to illuminate the crates within. 

Amongst these items was a large metal box, heavy with weight and death and just the right size for a single person. Through the faint echo of the pilots speaking in the next room and the ship creaking against the vacuum of the void outside, sounds of shifting occured within the box.

After a few more seconds of struggle from the coffin's contents, the chrome lid slid open and landed on the cold floor with a dull thud. The man inside shot up and opened his eyes, gasping for breath. He sat there for a moment, attempting to subside the sound of his heaving chest to listen. The pilots didn't seem to hear to coffin open. _Good._

The man slowly rose out of the box, grunting softly as his pained muscles helped him climb out. He then slid the coffin across the metal slab table it was resting on and sat down on the cleared space. Once his eyes had adjusted to the darkness and his breath had normalized, the feeling of the constricting garment on his chest reminded him of what had occurred. He popped open the top of his military uniform. As he slid it off, the red insignia on its shoulder made him sneer. Carefully, he removed the blaster-proof vest covering his torso.

***

When General Hux knew that the other generals and Ren had caught on to the presence of a spy in the First order, he understood that he had limited time to prepare for his inevitable discovery. After all, he had helped build up the immaculate level of knowledge and observance within its ranks that would now be responsible for his possible downfall. The fact was that Pryde caught on very quickly. He knew how Hux operated, having spent so much time trying to prove his superiority to the young general. If Hux had to cover for the resistance somehow, there would be no hiding his change in demeanor and reasoning.

So when the time came and he aided the escape of the ex-stormtrooper and his allies, he was prepared. Hux had acquired the vest a few days prior in anticipation of what was to come. He knew that as soon as he was discovered, Pryde would kill him without hesitation. He also knew that he would be killed in the quickest and most efficient way possible, by either being shot in the heart or head. After all, Pryce always aimed to take care of matters as soon as they arose, and he would not think twice about killing his rival in command. Seeing as how any measures to shield his head would have been noticed, he gambled and protected his heart. And it paid off.

The wound he had insisted on being given was a weak charade and he knew it. It was only to stave the suspicions of common officers and buy him some time. After being bandaged, Hux had slipped on the vest and faced Pryde. He knew what was at stake. _This was it._ This would either destroy his legacy or preserve it.

When the blaster's bolt hit him, Hux acted out as he had rehearsed. He let the impact knock him down, and fell limp on the pristine floor. The drug he had administered to himself a few minutes before kicked in right on time, slowing his heartbeat to a minimum and making his breaths minuscule. When he had been dragged away and the medical officer examined his body, they found no pulse and declared him dead. When he was placed in the coffin and put on the freighter, Hux simply waited for the drowsiness and pain to fade. 

Through his brief sleep, he contemplated the fact that he had lived. Over the past year of scheming against Ren he had built his hand and played it well. Pryde though he had the winning cards, but he still played the fool. For now. Even though Hux had lived, he had lost the power and command he had worked so hard to earn. He had won his life, but in the back of his head he could still hear his father calling him a failure.

***

After removing the vest, Hux rebuttoned his clothing and composed himself. The bolt hadn't pierced him, but it still left a large bruise from the impact. Hux was careful not to touch it or bump into things. 

Right. He needed to move. He walked around and scanned the room, eventually stumbling upon a crate carrying a shipment of standard issued blasters. Hux took one and moved towards the cockpit door. Through the crack he could see and hear the pilot and copilot.

"I still don't get it," the pilot remarked. " Pryde just killed the great General Hux for crying out loud, without any proof of treason. Not only that, but the body is being treated like less than that of a common trooper! And here we are, transporting the remains of one of the greatest leaders the First Order has ever had to be burned and forgotten on Mustafar. No ceremony, no recognition, not even a formal notification across the fleet! The only people who know he's gone are us and the officers who witnessed it." She sighed in frustration.

"It is a bit odd," the copilot replied. "But I trust that Pryde had his reasons. I mean, I'm certainly not going to walk up to him and ask questions. Although it is tragic, I guess it goes to show that the bastard wasn't any more special than the rest of us. It seems Supreme Leader Kylo Ren was always destined to come out on top."

The mention of that name put a bitter taste in Hux's mouth and an even worse expression on his features. Even in the wake of his supposed death, all anyone could talk about was _Ren_ . How _Ren_ was better. How _Ren_ rose to the top while Hux died with not even a bang, put a pathetic hush of the wind, barely heard through the galaxy and fleet he left behind. The rush of anger Hux felt pushed him to make his move.

Hux interacted with the panel on the wall and opened the door. Before the two pilots could even turn around and register that their esteemed general was, in fact, alive, they were not. Hux shot them both square in the head, watching them fall limp out of their chairs. He tutted. They had taken off their helmets thinking that they were alone and safe. They had certainly paid for their negligence.

Wasting no time, Hux pushed the pilot out of the way and secured himself in the seat she was in, shaking off the last bits of drowsiness. He noticed the small knife on her utility belt and took it, concealing it in his clothes. After all, one should always be prepared. 

Hux didn't like the idea of reaching out to the resistance, but his cards had nearly run out. He still had a Supreme Leader to kill, and they were his only option. Thankfully he had acquired the locations of their bases upon making a pact to spy for them. Not that they knew, but that was their fault for not being careful. Without further delay, Hux punched in the coordinates and prepared for the flight.

He was going to Ajan Kloss.


	2. Chapter 2

It had been about five hours since Hux landed on the heavily forested planet. He had been able to uncover the planet and general area of the base, but not its exact location. So he had spent his time making his way through the vast land and its dense foliage. 

There may have been civilization here at some point in the past, but that was so long ago that any remnants had succumbed to nature years ago. The mist and fog blanketed the ground, tricking the senses and filling the lungs with unwelcome moisture. The trees were tall and so numerous in some areas that the light could seldom be seen from below. In these places, the wind seemed to whisper and the wildlife was always watching.

Hux was in one such area right now, using a military flashlight to guide him through the jungle. He had abandoned his jacket long ago in the humid heat, and all he had left was the plain tank top that served as an undershirt to cover his torso. At some point his pants and boots had been covered in mud, and his gloves suffered from weathering and claw marks thanks to confrontations with the predators of the planet. His bright hair was a mess and clung to his forehead with sweat. Hux trudged through the darkness, still limping from the wound on his leg.

To say that he was out of his element was an understatement.

Hux was usually so put together, so in control. He had troops to back him up. He had a clear plan and all his pieces in place. But now, he was in the middle of a forest full of beasts with only a slight indication of where he was going. The sack full of supplies from the freighter on his back grew heavier every minute with fatigue, and the composed image he kept for himself was ruined by the conditions of his surroundings and circumstances. The powerful General Hux, feared leader and ruthless enemy, reduced to a weakened man with nothing and no one on his side.  _ Pathetic _ .

Despite the odds, Hux knew he was close. He couldn't tell why, but even though he had no clear path of logic to this conclusion he could feel it. Never before would he have let a silly  _ feeling  _ dictate his actions, but he also didn't have any other plan. And so follow it he did.

After a few minutes of relative silence, Hux heard a low growl from somewhere beyond his limited line of sight. He froze, guiding his flashlight around in an attempt to find the source. He breathed as shallow and slowly as he dared in order to conceal his presence. There was a rustle somewhere in front of him and he swore he saw a glimpse of the creature. 

Ignoring his surprise, he waited for the next movement. When it came, he shot his blaster in the direction of the noise. After only firing two bolts, the third never came. Hux cursed, pressing the trigger to no avail.  _ Kriff.  _ It must have sustained too much damage during his journey. He threw down the useless weapon and resorted to the only option he had left- running. 

Against his better judgement, Hux let the feeling guide him as he ran through the darkness. He could hear the creature behind him, snarling and snapping at his heels. His base instincts had kicked in, and all he could think about was escape. He ran for what seemed like forever, the adrenaline keeping his pain at bay. Eventually moonlight came through the trees once more, and he could see a clearing in the distance. 

With all the strength his thin and weak body could muster, Hux made a last ditch effort to make it to what he could tell were sentient-made structures beyond the trees. He finally made it, nearly tripping on a root as he experienced fresh air and natural light for the first time all day. 

As Hux approached the nearest building, he noticed some people with blasters stationed at the turrets on top. They raised their weapons, and for a moment Hux tensed and prepared to evade their fire. The first round of bolts were shot and relief washed over him as he realized they were shooting past him and at the beast. He ducked and ran faster, not daring to look behind at whatever was chasing him. 

One of the gunners finally hit their mark, and Hux heard the creature screech and fall behind. He began slowing down, coming to a stop in front of the secured door. His head was pounding and his legs began to give out.

"Hey down there!" One of the voices from above yelled. "We're the resistance! Just wait there and we'll-" they paused, examining Hux closer. "Holy shit, is that who I think it is?" They brought their communicator to their face and spoke into it. "You better get a squad down here, quick!... Why?... Well sir, General Hux is at our door."


	3. Chapter 3

When a group of resistance soldiers exited the base and surrounded him, Hux didn't attempt to escape or struggle. He let himself sink to his knees in exhaustion as the wall of people around him raised their blasters. 

"Put your arms out and don't move!" One of them barked. "If you try to attack or escape, we will shoot!"

Hux slowly put his hands out in front of him, and they were swiftly handcuffed together. "I am not here to fight you," he replied, voice tired and barely above a murmur. "I have left the First Order. I am here peacefully."

"Yeah, right, just don't try anything you murdering-"

"Keep your head, Arik," a new voice said. "Let's see what's what first, okay?"

"Yes, general. Sorry."

General? Hux had questions. The general and leader of the resistance had always been Leia Organa, everyone knew that. Who was the mystery man in charge? Where was Organa?

His inquiries were soon answered as the soldiers parted, letting the man in question through. Hux recognized the man before him from the star destroyer less than ten hours ago, and as a former prisoner back when the race for the map to Skywalker was top priority. Poe Dameron.

Poe addressed the mess of a man in front of him. "Well, I certainly didn't expect to see you so soon, or at all really. You stayed on that ship after helping us escape. So why are you here?"

Hux couldn't see any anger or aggression on Dameron's face, much to his confusion. He had killed so many of his allies, foiled so many of their operations. Why didn't he try to execute him on sight? Dameron had no reason to trust Hux.

Hux didn't understand, but he used the lack of malice to preserve himself. "Pryde found out I was the spy and shot me. He thinks he killed me, but I survived. I can't go back to the First Order. So I am here." Hux looked directly at the general, playing to any sympathy he could earn from him. "Please, I am hurt and expended. Take me somewhere safe and remove these security measures and I will tell you everything."

Poe seems to ponder this for a moment, deep in thought. "Alright. I'll take you into the base, and remove the cuffs. But I'm afraid I'll have to keep some guards around you for the time being. I'd like to believe you, but I'll need proof that you are no longer loyal to the First Order." He gestures to the soldiers, and all but four of them dissipate back into the areas they came from. "Come on," he says, and Hux stands up and follows him inside.

***

Soon, Hux is led to a secure room within the base. It is mostly empty, with nothing but a table and some scattered chairs. Hux notes that once everyone is inside the door slides closed and locks.  _ A viper in a cage, _ he thinks to himself.

"By all means, take a seat," Poe offers, vaguely pointing to a chair. Hux doesn't dare refuse, sitting down and facing the general. His handcuffs are removed by one of his makeshift guards. "So, then," Dameron says. "Tell me what happened and what you know."

Hux explains everything. He tells of his burning hatred of Ren, the animosity he held towards his unrivaled successes despite Hux's hard and careful work. He recalls deciding to spy for the resistance. He wanted Ren out of power, no matter what it took. Hux gave information to his enemies under an alias, and eventually built up trust and reputation with them over the course of the last year. He confirms that the transmission about Palpatine came from him. When the time came, he made the decision to help Poe, FN-2187, and the wookie escape. He explains what Palpatine has planned for the Final Order. He explains their plan of attack, their numbers, their fleet. Everything that was not solely for Ren to know. He tells them about the vest, the drug. His trek through the jungle. All the while Poe listens, clearly working out what he is being told.

"In all honesty," Hux says, blatantly lying, "I have renounced the ways of my past. I have seen the First Order as it truly is. And I would love nothing more than to see it reduced to ash." He makes sure to say this with anger and conviction. Dameron needed all the help he could get. If he saw that Hux had the same goal, he'd take the bait.

And so he did. "Well, I can't say that I approve of your obsessive need to kill the Supreme Leader, but you want what I do at its core, so I'll take it. But you'll have to forgive me if I'm still a little wary."

Hux began to reply, but then someone opened the door and came in. FN-2187. 

"You!" the ex-trooper exclaimed, pointing at Hux. "How dare you come here after all you've done?"

Dameron sighs. "This is General Finn. You saw him on the star destroyer."

"Yes," Hux replied, making no attempt to hide his sneer, "I recall. We've been acquainted before."

"How could you terrorize the galaxy for years, abuse everyone under your command, and have the audacity to come to the base of the people you swore to destroy?" Finn yelled, eyes full of hurt and anger.

Poe rushed to hold Finn back. "Finn, please. I know its hard, but I think he's going to help us. He already gave us valuable information, and if its true we may have the upper hand."

"But how could you even give him the chance to speak? He'll just stab us in the back. He's nothing but a treacherous snake!"

"Finn, listen to me. I don't like it any more than you do. But we don't have many options. At least give him a chance, please?"

The two generals simply made eye contact for a beat, and it was as if Dameron was silently asking for 'Finn' to relax. After a moment Finn's expression and demeanor seemed to soften.  _ Interesting _ .

Hux spoke up. "Well, if you two are done discussing how to deal with me right in front of me, I would like to request medical aid and somewhere to rest. If that is agreeable, of course."  _ Make them feel foolish for thinking you're hostile by appearing fragile. Make them let their guard down. _

That seemed to shake the two men out of their argument. "Of course," Poe said softly. "Finn, could you and the guards show Hux to an empty room?  _ Nicely? _ "

Finn waited before answering, still holding some anger. "Fine. Follow me." He glared at Hux as the two of them exited.


	4. Chapter 4

Hux was paraded through the corridors of the base, with Finn leading and the four soldiers on all sides. When they finally came to a stop, Finn turned to face their "guest".

"Look, I'm sorry for acting out. I should know better than to judge based on the past, especially since I came from the same place as you. But you'll have to understand that it's going to be a while before I trust you. I'm going to try. For the cause, and for Poe."

"I don't take offense," Hux replied. "I wouldn't trust me either. But I would be careful with who you insult next time." Hux hoped the dagger sharp look in his eyes made his point.

Finn huffed. "Yeah, well… This is your room, for now. I'll leave it unlocked, but the guards will be out here. They will be near you at all times. If you need anything just ask. Hopefully sooner than later there will be a meeting to discuss our plan of attack on Palpatine and the First Order. Since Poe seems to think you'll be important, you should be there. The guards will escort you. Until then, do what you need to. I'll have someone fetch some medical supplies."

Hux simply nodded and entered the small space. The door shut behind him and he could hear Finn walking away. For the first time in weeks, Hux felt a sense of… peace. almost.

He took inventory of the room. It held only the basics. A cot in the corner. A small dresser and mirror for personal belongings. A folding chair, on which some clothes were laid.

Hux walked over and examined the clothing. He assumed they were for him. Even if they weren't, his current outfit was a mess and these unfamiliar ones would do. He set the clothes on the cot and glanced at himself in the mirror. As suspected, he was covered in filth, cuts, and blood. The speckles of mud on his bare arms and shoulders blended in with the freckles there. His pants and tank top were littered with rips. One of his boots had a hole in it. 

With a heavy sigh, Hux pulled off his top and tossed it aside. He ran his fingers gingerly across the blues and blacks the bruise painted on his chest, wincing at the pain. 

There was no refresher in here, but a bucket of water in the corner and a small cloth. Hux went to work cleaning himself as much as he could, careful not to make any of his wounds worse. He took the rest of his clothing off and did the same, wiping away the dinge. When he had finished, he pulled on the provided clothing. 

The fabrics and colors felt alien to him. After wearing the same standard uniform for most of his life, the texture of these deep grey cargo pants felt foreign on his skin and the white hue of the simple shirt looked odd on him. It was very different from the monochrome black he was accustomed to. Trying to ignore the strangeness of it all, Hux pulled on the dark tan leather jacket and black boots that also came with the outfit. He finished by clipping the utility belt and holster to his hips.

Hux made an attempt to fix his hair into something less unruly. As he looked at himself once more, he considered his plan. He didn't care about the resistance of course, he never did. There was no going back to the First Order either. At this point, he didn't care. All he had to do was secure Ren's demise, and then he would take a ship and leave it all behind. Maybe he would even blow up some of their supplies here at the base first out of spite. Hux would help these foolish dreamers, but only until he got what he wanted. Now, how to get it…

He decided to leave the matter be for the time being, opting to wait for an opportunity. He still had to operate carefully, lest he give away his intentions prematurely. 

Just then the supplies arrived. Hux redressed the wound on his leg, sealed his cuts, and applied some bacta gel to his bruise. It would still take time to heal, but this would speed it up. Then Hux secured his knife in a compartment on his pants. As satisfied as he could be, he laid on the cot and tried to get some rest.


	5. Chapter 5

Hux's sleep was anything but rest. In his dream, he stood at the foot of the throne of the First Order. The room was burning, as it did when he found Ren with Snoke's body at his feet. He noticed he was wearing a uniform again. It was not the garments he wore as a general, but the clothing he had worn as a lowly cadet in his youth.

A figure was perched on the regal seat, cloaked in shadow. Hux could not make out who it was, but their very presence sparked fear in his soul. He found his cold exterior fading away, giving in to trembling limbs and a persistent urge to run. But his body would not let him, remaining rooted in front of where the figure sat. 

After an eternity of terrified silence, the faceless entity spoke. "Look at you. What you have become." Hux immediately recognized the voice of Snoke. "Everything you ever worked for, everything you are, _gone._ "

The entity's tone was condescending and full of disgust for whom it spoke to. Hux's fear began melting into anger. Not even in sleep could he escape his shortcomings, his mistakes.

The figure continued, now speaking in the modulated tone of Kylo Ren. "You're weak, pathetic. You could never measure up to me. You are and always will be doomed to fail!"

Hux wanted nothing more than to lash out at the figure in that moment, but still he could not will himself to move.

Once again, the voice morphed, this time copying Hux's father. _If you could even call him that._ "Little Armitage. Still useless. You never had a place in the First Order. You never had a place as my son. My blood will die with your insolence!"

Hux tried to speak back, to tell whoever this was that they were wrong. To tell them that he was not powerless. But his mouth would not open, the words would not come out. Hux wasn't sure he believed any of that anyways. Not now. Not anymore.

"For all you've done, you have nothing to show for your labor but a temporary home amongst the rebels you have spent your whole life trying to eradicate," a new voice spoke. This one was unfamiliar. Hux waited for this demon of dreams to continue, but instead found that it was beginning to stand up. He couldn't tear his eyes away as the entity stepped into the light, revealing white eyes, rotting features, and a cruel smile. Hux had never heard or seen Emperor Palpatine, but something in him knew that this was him. He hadn't been so sure of himself since before his escape from the coffin.

Palpatine grinned even wider, reveling in the terror he commanded from Hux. "You wanted to rule. You wanted to destroy every obstacle in your way. Yet you wasted your chances. This leaves you with one final choice- submit to me and my empire, or watch as the galaxy burns, including you."

With all the willpower he had, Hux fought against the invisible force chaining his body in place. After a final push, he managed to open his mouth and speak. 

"You're wrong," he challenged, slowly building the strength to straighten up and face Palpatine. " _I_ was wrong. I was wrong to believe in a cause that never gave a damn about me. I strived for praise and a sense of belonging that never came. I have spent my entire life since childhood being in service to others with nothing in return! And all for what? The First Order was never meant to rule the galaxy. It was all a grand scheme to lead up to this moment, when you would unleash your wrath on everyone. The First Order, everything I have known and believed in, was just a ploy to suit the whims of others!"

Palpatine simply watched in amusement as Hux spoke. Hux never contemplated what he had just said, but part of him knew that it was true. No matter how hard he tried to tell himself otherwise, he really was nothing but a pawn, an expendable resource. His intelligence was nothing but a tool.

Hux finally managed to take a step forward, advancing towards the sith. Yet still, Palpatine did not react. "I am done serving others," Hux continued. "Not the First Order, not Kylo Ren, and not you."

With a pained yell, Hux tried to take another step. But before he could, Palpatine extended his arm, and Hux went flying onto the floor. No matter how hard he tried, he could not move anymore. All Hux could do was watch as the reanimated corpse loomed over him, cackling at his pitiful attempt at defiance.

Hux screamed as he felt electricity coursing through his body. "We will see," the Emperor said.


	6. Chapter 6

Hux jolted awake, the remnants of a silent scream still on his lips. He bolted upright, slightly shaking and chest heaving. He had nightmares often, but nothing like what he had just experienced. Never had he been so shaken to his core, never had it felt so  _ real. _ If he didn't know better he would think he had been talking to the actual Emperor Palpatine.

There was a knock at the door, and Hux managed a quiet "Enter," while trying to process his dream. One of the guards entered, and Hux scrambled to straighten himself out. He silently cursed at himself for allowing anyone to see him so off guard.

"The generals have called a meeting right away. Kijimi has been destroyed, and the Final Order is beginning."

Hux held back the chill down his spine and tense feeling in his gut. "Very well. Lead the way, then."

Without another word, Hux and his guards made their way through the building and back outside. Most of the resistance was gathered around a large holotable. Comms and computers were scattered around the area, abandoned for the meeting. As Hux approached the crowd, they parted with apprehension. He could see the looks of disdain on some faces, and bewilderment on others. Hux usually enjoyed garnering the attention of others, but not like this.

Poe Damoron paused in his briefing to address the ex-general. "Good to see that you've joined us." Poe gestured towards Hux and looked at the expectant soldiers. "Many of you will recognize this man as General Hux of the First Order. He is willing to help us take down Palpatine. I know you might hold something against him, but please try to respect him." Dameron looked back to Hux. "By all means, please give us insight when you can."

Hux simply nodded back at the general in a silent thanks. Poe continued where he left off. "Now as I was saying, we have some idea of what we're up against, and it isn't pretty. Right now we need to figure out how to keep those star destroyers from leaving Exegol's atmosphere. We can hit them hard as long as they're stationary, but as soon as they jump to hyper speed we won't be able to cover all of them. The newly found droid D-O contains a transmission that may hold the answers, but it was damaged over time. We are still trying to-"

"May I see the transmission?" Hux interrupted. He saw Finn give him a stern look out of the edge of his vision. 

"Sorry, what?" Poe asked.

"I'd like to see the transmission. I think I know what it is about. If I can see it and confirm, then I will explain what it means."

Poe thought about it for a moment. "Alright. Finn, can you retrieve the transmission again?"

"Sure, I'll get it for you." Finn replied. His tone made it clear that he was doing this for Poe's sake, not Hux's.

Finn left for a moment and came back with the small cone-headed droid. He plugged a cable into its head, and the transmission came to life on the holotable.

Hux studied it carefully and listened intently. There were frequent places where the images would turn to static, and the audio would cut out. However, Hux put two and two together by the end of the transmission. He knew exactly what this was about. And It just might work.

"Its the signal tower," Hux told the crowd. "The ships are not capable of dimensional navigation on their own while on the planet. They rely on a tower on the ground to point them in the right direction until they hit space."

"How in the galaxy do you know that's true?" A voice in the sea of people queried.

"The First Order vessels work similarly," Hux explained. "That is why we never take a star destroyer planetside unless absolutely necessary. I recognized the schematics and programming shown in the transmission."

Poe raised his brows. "And so if we were to take out the tower, they wouldn't be able to leave?"

"Precisely. It would very risky and I doubt the Emperor would take that chance after planning for so long. However, I do not recommend targeting the tower on the ground. The fleet will spot a ground assault easily. There is another signal tower on the head ship of the fleet. That is the case for all star destroyer fleets. Feign a ground attack, and then hit the ship's tower instead when they switch over the signal. They won't expect it."

A young woman spoke up. It took Hux a moment to pinpoint where he knew her, but then he realized she was the person accompanying Finn when they had tried to sneak aboard his ship with the code breaker. Rose Tico.

"But how will we attack the ship's tower?" She asked. "Their defenses are too strong for an air assault. They'll just gun us out of the sky."

Hux opened his mouth to answer but Finn beat him to it. "Why don't we still use a ground assault?"

Poe looked confused. "I don't get it, what do you mean?"

"Well, we could use the units of a ground assault, but place them on the exterior of the ship. They won't be able to sense us on their scanners right away, and no one will see it coming."

"That's absolutely insane," Hux interjected. "But I think that may just work."

Finn's eyes widened in surprise, as if he couldn't believe Hux was agreeing with him. Poe seemed to consider the plan. "That makes sense. And if you two believe in it, I'm willing to give it a shot. The question is, who and what do we plan on using to take the tower out?"

Finn answered. "Jannah and her friends. They are trained in combat, and they know how the First order and Empire operate. Also, the ship's scanners are tuned to detect aircraft, so it will be hard for them to spot their mounts."

"Well then, its settled. Finn, you will lead the assault on the star destroyer. Take Hux with you, he can point the way. The rest of us, well will take out their canons. Those things can destroy entire planets, so each one we blow up is a planet saved. Once the signal is jammed, we will destroy the fleet. Are we clear?"

A chorus of "yes sirs" and other cheers of agreement rippled through the clearing. Everyone got to work right away, preparing the x-wings and gathering equipment. Hux approached Finn on the other side of the table.

"Come on," Finn said. "We better get moving." He called off the guards, leaving Hux free. "You better help us do this. Here, take a blaster. You'll need it." Finn tossed Hux the blaster he was carrying and began walking away, expecting Hux to follow. Then he turned around briefly, speaking without hostility to Hux's surprise. "And thank you, for agreeing with me."

And with that, the two men headed for the transports. Hux got the feeling that everything was about to change, one way or another.


	7. Chapter 7

As soon as the transport ships were loaded and secure, they took off, the x-wings and other combat vessels trailing close behind. Hux watched out of the ship windows as they left the jungle planet behind, admiring its vibrant green colors. He was alongside Finn, the woman named Jannah, and a handful of other deserters from Kef Bir. There were about a dozen of such transports clustered together, all containing the "ground assault".

"Alright," the pilot spoke up. "We're going to stay here in orbit until the rest of our forces get here, then we'll all make the jump to Exegol together. Just hang tight."

Hux took this time to reflect on his dream. It was still bothering him, the memory a constant nagging presence in his mind. Did he really mean what he said? The more he thought about it, the more convinced he was that he did. Hux had spent every waking minute striving to advance the First Order's path to domination. He poured his soul, his brain in to every mission, every conquest. But did that mean anything? Evidently not, as he was killed without thought. He doubted anyone even missed him.

His ruminations produced a swell of hatred in his bones. He meant nothing to them. Kylo Ren was always destined to best him by the will of Palpatine. He was set up to fail from the very beginning...

No. He had not failed the First Order. It had failed him. And he was going to make every one one of them pay. Hux went into this final battle for nothing more than a chance to kill Ren. But now it was bigger than that. Now it was deeply personal.

The First Order _will_ fall. _May the afterlife have mercy on their_ _souls_.

Hux was snapped out of his rabbit hole of thoughts by Jannah. She was waving a hand in front of him, gently calling his name. He turned to face her, disoriented from being pulled out of his head. "Sorry, yes?" He responded.

"Oh, ah, I just was asking if you were alright sir. You looked pretty bothered."

"If you can even call it that, then yes, I am alright." He paused. "But I believe I have the right to say that the last day of events has been more than taxing on me."

"I understand," Jannah said. "Leaving the First Order was hard for us too. It took me a long time to really let it go. But it must be even worse for you. You left not even half a day ago and yet here you are off to fight them."

"Trust me, I have no qualms with shooting them." The truth was, at first it did concern him. But not anymore. Hux didn't know where his place was, but it wasn't with the First Order.

"You know," Jannah said, "At one point I was afraid of you, back when I served. But I don't think I am anymore. You've seen the truth, just as I have. When it counts, I trust you'll do the right thing."

If only Hux believed that as well. He wasn't sure how to respond. His pride couldn't bring him to thank her.

Hux was saved from the silence by the voice of Poe Damoron.

"Okay everyone, this is it! We will all jump to Exegol in a few seconds. Good luck and may the force be with us!"

And with that, the pilot made the jump to hyper speed.

***

Hux almost felt calmed by the washes of blue surrounding the transport as it made its way to Exegol. Almost. The thought of this possibly being his final stand cured him of any comfort. There was no saying whether he would make it off of this planet alive.

Speaking of the devil, the transport came out of hyperspace, revealing the demonic landscape below. Clouds covered its barren surface, sending a constant barrage of lighting towards it. Immediately, the battle began. 

Hux watched as the chaos unfolded all around him. Bolts were being shot left and right, and he could already hear explosions. As they approached the main ship, Hux looked below to the tower on the ground. As planned, an empty transport pretended to land near the tower. Almost on cue, he saw the lights on it flicker off. They had moved the signal. The empty vessel immediately relaunched, heading towards the main aerial battle. So far, so good.

"The signal has been moved to the star destroyer," Hux announced. "Are we nearing the drop zone?"

"Yes," Finn replied. "We're nearly there!"

Not too long after, the back entrance of the transport opened up to reveal the top of the large ship. The transport slowly got as close as it could until the signal was given.

"This is it!" Finn told the other passengers. "Follow Hux. He'll lead us to the tower. Take out any weapons and troopers you can. When we reach our destination, cover us while we slice the tower."

"You heard him," Hux yelled over the sounds of the battle. "Let's move! Go!"

Without further delay, Hux leaped out of the transport, the rest of the passengers following suit. The other transports then unloaded their calvary. Now this Hux could do. He was at the front of a team, leading them with efficiency. Once again he felt the rush of being in command. How ironic that it was now with a small rebellion force.

He guided them amongst the turrets and other elements of the ship's hull. Hux could anticipate where the next barrage of fire would come from, as the First Order ship designs greatly mirrored that of the Empire's. He would call out something to shoot here, dodge a missile there. All the while, Hux gladly shot down every trooper he saw. After the injustice he had suffered at their hands, revenge was sweet.

The motley group eventually reached the tower, and both Hux and Finn began their work. Between the two of them, the slicing was quick. Any animosity amongst the two men was forgotten in the moment, replaced with a need to succeed. In no time, the signal was down.

"The tower's signal has been stopped! Go get them!" Finn yelled into his communicator.

Hux watched as x-wings went soaring above him, aiming their fire at every cannon they could reach. It was quite the sight, seeing the thermal blasts light up the cold, dark planet. The deserters continued holding off the forces that were landing on the ship as Hux monitored the status of the tower. After a few minutes of destruction on the resistance's part, he noticed that the tower was booting back up.

"They are rebooting the tower!" Hux yelled to Finn. 

"Yeah, I see it," Finn replied. "We need to find a way to shut it down permanently!"

"The only way to do that is to rewire the whole system and make it destroy itself! That would put us in the area of the explosion!"

"Then so be it."

Hux didn't know what to think. Was he really willing to succumb to death so that the resistance could succeed? 

Hux could hear Poe speaking through Finn's communicator, telling him to get everyone back on the transports. "I'm not done yet!" Finn said back. "We have an idea, just keep going."

Finn addressed the rest of the team. "Get back to the transports and get out of here! I'll stay behind and rewire this thing."

Jannah spoke up. "I'm staying with you, you'll need backup!"

Hux continued to assess his situation. It was then that he had an epiphany. "I'm staying too!" He told Finn.

The tower was connected to the main frame of the entire ship's system. Chances were that if they blew it up, it would cause a chain reaction and destroy the entire ship. And Hux was willing to bet that Pryde and the others were on the bridge of this vessel right now. If he was going to enter Hell today, he was damn sure going to take that insufferable man with him.

Hux could tell that the aerial battle was starting to take a turn for the worst. Ship after ship was destroyed, many of them from the resistance. Their forces were wearing thin. If there was ever a time to make a last ditch effort, this was it.

They wasted no time, prying open the electrical panel and sifting through wires. They hadn't gotten very far when Hux heard a great booming sound from above him. And then another. And another. He looked up to find hundreds of ships entering Exegol's atmosphere. 

The people of the galaxy had come to help the resistance win.


	8. Chapter 8

Even though he didn't show it, Hux felt a sense of awe upon seeing the massive sea of ships blanketing the sky. Not necessarily because of the size of the armada, but the sheer diversity and loyalty of it. There were clearly ships of all planetary origins scattered throughout, and they had all come together to protect the galaxy without hesitation. And to think all this time he underestimated the sheer power of fighting for freedom. Up until today, Hux didn't even realize that he never had freedom until now. Not truly, anyways. So he supposed he was fighting for his freedom too.

Finn cheered loudly and resumed working on the tower with renewed enthusiasm. Jannah was fighting back against the troopers with all her might, doing whatever it took to hold them back. Hux joined Finn, trying to complete the job quickly while they had an edge.

Evidently, they didn't have it for long. There was a great rumble that shook the entire planet, and then an impressive surge of lightning shot up and into the sky. It hit all of the aircraft simultaneously. Not a moment later, they all began plummeting from the sky, including the ship Hux was currently on. 

The star destroyer began to tilt. Hux and the others began swaying, losing their balance. Hux reached out for anything he could hold onto to stabilize himself. He grabbed onto a large piece of debris that had been lodged near the satellite tower. He held on tight and tried his best to continue rewiring. The other two were clearly struggling as well.

Hux tried to focus to the best of his ability. As the ship kept falling and tilting, he noticed that some troopers were beginning to slide along the ship. One of them slid right past him, grabbing onto the same debris as Hux. With a grunt, he kicked them off, causing them to slide off the edge.

He continued like this until a sharp metal object hit him on the leg. He hissed in pain. Hux didn't have to look to know that his blaster wound had reopened, and was bleeding once more. He cursed to himself and tried to ignore it. Just then, the lighting disappeared from whence it came.

Slowly, the star destroyer stabilized, as did the rest of the ships. Once it was upright again, Hux let go of the debris and stood upright again. It was then that Finn noticed the red gushing from Hux's leg.

"You're bleeding really bad, we need to get you some help!" He exclaimed.

"Don't worry about me, just finish this!"

"But-"

"Just finish the damn job, I'll be fine!"

Hux could tell that Finn wasn't happy that his teammate was bleeding out, and frankly he didn't know how to feel about the concern. When was the last time someone cared about how he was? Had anyone ever cared?

"This is it," Finn announced. "This is the last one. Once I connect these two cables, we all make a run for it."

"Do it!" Hux yelled over the tie fighters flying past.

Finn connected the cables and immediately began running. Jannah and Hux followed suit. They could barely make any distance before the tower detonated. The blast sent them all flying. 

Hux landed harshly, knocking the wind out of him. His ears were ringing. He clutched his leg, the impact making the pain flare up. His mind was fuzzy, but he could make out the silhouette of the ship's bridge as it blew up in a symphony of fire and heat. It worked. Through everything he was feeling, Hux couldn't help but smile. Pryde was certainly dead. Good riddance. Not even that, but Pryde died and Hux lived. An outcome far better than anticipated.

Hux then noticed that the ship was tilting again. With all power and controls gone, the star destroyer was going to crash for real. He began sliding, velocity increasing as the ship tilted more and more. Hux did his best to evade obstacles as he approached the edge of the vessel. He saw Finn and Jannah sliding beside him, looking appropriately scared. At this point Hux felt practically weightless due to the sharp angle they were plummeting at.

The three reached the edge, and Hux closed his eyes in preparation for the fatal fall. However, he never felt it. Instead, he felt himself hit the solid floor of another ship. He opened his eyes to find himself on none other than the Millennium Falcon.

Hux tried to scramble to his feet, only to fall back down as fresh pain shot up his leg. Even though he tried his best to not appear vulnerable, he couldn't help crying out. Finn rose to his feet next to the injured man.

"Come on, let me help you up."

Hux wanted to protest, but he also didn't stop Finn from lifting him up and draping Hux's arm over his shoulder. Leaning on Finn for support, the two made their way to a cutout in the Falcon's wall that served as a medical bed. Finn hoisted Hux onto the bed and began trying to assess the damage. Just as soon as he began searching for health stims and bacta gel, Finn froze in place. 

"What's- what's the matter?" Hux weakly asked the visibly shaken man.

"It's Rey… I can't feel her presence anymore." Finn's lip trembled.

"What are you talking about?"

"I… I'm force sensitive. If I reach out I can usually sense her, but I feel nothing."

Hux didn't reply, instead trying to work out the implications of the confession. This ex-trooper, this deserter turned resistance leader, could wield the force. Hux didn't know what to think.

"I meant to tell her," Finn continued. "And now… and now I think she's gone." Tears began falling down his face. Jannah joined them in the room. She saw Finn's sorrow and approached him, putting a hand on his shoulder.

Hux knew little about the powerful scavenger girl, just that she was a worthy rival of Ren. Part of him wondered if he was behind her demise. For a long pause there was no sound but Finn's soft crying and Hux's shallow breaths. Jannah picked up the duty of patching Hux up to let Finn grieve.

All of the sudden, Finn straightened up. "Rey?" He grinned with relief. "Its Rey! She's alive!"

"Really?" Jannah asked with hope.

"Yes, and- Kylo Ren?" Finn looks confused.

"You seem very perplexed," Hux noted. So Ren was here, unsurprisingly.

"The thing is, I can sense Rey, and I can sense Kylo Ren. But not separately? It's like they're directly intertwined. Like one being. But not."

Hux hadn't the faintest idea what that meant, so he kept his mouth shut.

"Even though I can feel both of them," Finn continued, "They're both very faint. I think they're keeping each other alive. We need to get them out of there."

Another man entered the room. Hux recognized the war hero immediately from his studies as a child, Lando Calrissian. "Its too risky to bring the Falcon down there, it's too big and noticeable. I can get the empty transport ship to get them to safety. I understand you want to be there personally, but it isn't safe. Besides, we need to get this man some real medical assistance." Calrissian pointed at Hux. 

Hux had to agree. The hastily applied bandages wrapped around his thigh could only last so long before it wasn't enough to stop him from bleeding out.

"Fine, you're right," Finn conceded.

There was a crackling noise from Finn's communicator. He took it out hand held it in his palm. "Hello?"

"Finn, its Poe! We've done it. We won!"

Finn, Jannah, and Lando's faces lit up. Sure enough, every one of the Empire and First Order's ships had been wiped out. The three freedom fighters hugged and cheered, reveling in their success.

The galaxy would finally be at peace. As hard as it was to grasp, Hux hoped it was true. He could finally put the First Order behind him. No more wars. No more expectations. No more abuse. All of it was gone. Except for Hux himself.

_ And Kylo Ren _ . The awful situational irony of it all almost made Hux want to laugh. The only two known survivors of the First Order, and all they wanted to do was kill each other. But he had to admit that he was slightly intrigued. Saving Rey, betraying Palpatine? This was nothing like the supreme leader he had come to know. Something happened to make him act this way. He didn't know what, but he wanted to figure it out. Part of Hux doubted that even now Ren would think of anyone but himself, the demanding ass he was. He was almost angry that Ren had seemingly done something that was actually commendable. It made Hux want to murder him a little less. Just a  _ little less,  _ mind you. 

As Hux laid in the corner while everyone else celebrated, he felt his consciousness slipping. Blood was seeping through the wound dressing already. His breathing slowed. The roaring of the cheers across the planet faded into silence and Hux's vision went black.


	9. Chapter 9

Hux felt someone gently shaking him. Slowly, he woke up from his dreamless slumber. His head was pounding and his vision was blurry. Eventually Jannah came into focus in front of him.

"Oh good, you're awake," she sighed with relief. "You've lost a lot of blood. When you passed out, we got worried."

Hux made an attempt to speak, but his throat was unexpectedly dry and hoarse. He tried again. "Where are we?" He rasped out.

"Back on Ajan Kloss. And the galaxy is free," she smiled.

Just then a large wookie approached the bed, growling in greeting.

"There you are!" Jannah said. "Could you please carry this man out, so a medic can help him?"

Hux realized this was Chewbacca, who uncharacteristically scared Hux upon being taken prisoner. A moment he didn't want to be reminded of.

Chewbacca made it to Hux and began trying to pick him up. "Wait a minute, you can't just-" Hux exclaimed. He squirmed and tried to evade the wookie's grip, but to no avail. Hux had no choice but to hold on as Chewie carried him out of the ship. Nevertheless, Hux protested the whole way. How undignified.

Hux's headache grew worse when his eyes met sunlight. It was awfully bright and the celebration all through the base was so loud that it made his ears ring. A woman with a wheelchair approached them.

"Hello Chewie! I'm here to get Hux to the medical bay. Just set him in the chair please."

"I am quite capable of walking," Hux retorted.

"But that doesn't mean you should. Let yourself rest, you've more than done your part."

And with that, Chewbacca set Hux in the wheelchair. The woman began wheeling Hux through the clearing, parting the cheering crowds to get by.

Hux looked around at the revelers. Friends hugging, commanders crying, lovers kissing. Disgusting. He spotted Poe and Finn in the crowd. They raced towards each other, meeting in a hug. After a moment they pulled back and kissed each other through smiles and giggles. Hux knew it! He could tell there was something between them from the first time he saw them interact.  _ How sickeningly sappy, _ Hux thought.

Hux and the woman eventually made it inside and into the medical bay. Inside were several beds, cabinets full of supplies, and some bacta suits hanging on the wall, ready for use. 

"Can you make it to the bed?" The woman asked.

"Yes, I can." Hux answered.

He could not. Hux began wobbling as soon as he stood up. The woman swooped in and helped him over to the medical bed. He laid down with a wheeze. The woman began shuffling around looking for something. Hux laid still, willing his pounding head to cease hurting. The bandages on his leg were soaked with red.  _ Kriff _ .

"Here we go," the woman said, returning to the bedside. "I'm Nora, by the way."

"Well I suppose you already know who I am."

Nora smiled gently. "Yes, I do. Now please just try to sit still."

Nora began by removing the current dressing on Hux's leg. When it was gone, the wound was exposed through a rip in his cargo pants. Hux couldn't help but look at it. It was much worse than he suspected. Whatever it was that hit his leg not only reopened the wound, but made it much deeper and larger. A blaster wound had turned into a large gash.

"Okay, this might sting," Nora warned. She pricked the skin near the wound with a med stim. Hux hissed. After the stim had been administered, Nora cleaned the wound and applied bacta gel to it. The entire time, Hux grit his teeth and gripped the thin sheet on the bed tightly.

"Im done," Nora finally said. "Ill just redress it and then you can relax. I'm going to have to ask you to stay in bed for a few days. After that, you can walk with assistance or crutches."

"Thank you," Hux responded quietly. He didn't know why he said it. And right now, he didn't care.

Nora just nodded, as if she knew Hux wouldn't want to admit what he had said. Once she finished, she pulled the curtain separating Hux's bed from the others shut. She left him to his privacy, exiting the bay.

Laying there, all alone, reality hit Hux. The only home he had ever known was gone. In hindsight it wasn't much of a home at all, but the First Order was the only thing he knew. It was familiar. This was not. Everyone he used to speak with daily, his quarters on the ship, all gone. Hux felt more alone than ever. Without the First Order, what was he? Who was he? Really, who was Armitage Hux? 

Hux had never been without an answer to that. He was a general, of course. A member of the First Order. An agent to the Cause. But now he was none of that. He was just Armitage. A man alone, scared, and uncertain, not even able to walk at the moment.

For the first time since he was a boy, Hux felt silent tears streaming down his cheeks.

***

Sometime later, Hux was awoken from a sleep he didn't know he was in. The lack of nightmares let him wake up in peace for once. From the other side of the curtain, Hux could hear frantic shuffling about and medics speaking. It would seem that more wounded had arrived.

Hux could make out Nora's voice. "Hurry, get them into the bacta suits. And whatever you do, keep their hands together."

That was odd. Hux could fathom why whoever these two patients were had to have their hands clasped. Maybe he was delirious from the blood loss. 

Eventually the ruckus died down, and the room was silent again. Hux was curious as to who the two others behind the curtain were. His curiosity loss to his exhaustion, however, and the man went back to sleep.

***

The next few days were dreadfully boring. It was always the same. Nora would check up on him every morning and afternoon, his meals were delivered three times a day, and he would drift in and out of sleep as his body worked to recover. By now the wound had healed substantially, but it was still highly bothersome. As of this morning's checkup, putting any pressure on it was still too much. Nora had told him he would be ready to walk again in the next day or two, thanks to the bacta gel speeding the healing process.

But there was something different about today. As far as Hux could tell, the other two patients had finally awoken and been let out of the bacta suits sometime in the last day. Hux still had yet to see them, as the curtain was always drawn, but he knew one of them was still in the bed next to his. They hadn't spoken while Hux was awake though, so he couldn't tell who it was.

Just then he heard a different medic enter the bay and approach the mystery patient. "How are you doing today Ben?" The nurse asked.  _ Did he just say Ben? _

Hux knew the deep voice that replied instantly. "I'm still really sore, but besides that not awful."

It was Ren. There was no mistaking it, it had to be him. Hux tensed up but held back, waiting and listening to the conversation. Hux let out a breath he didn't know he was holding when the nurse left the room. Immediately, he leaned over in his bed and yanked the curtain open as much as he could.

Sure enough, the ebony haired man he knew and despised was laying in the bed next to his. Kylo turned his head to face the intruder. Hux saw recognition dawn in Ren's eyes. He sat up quickly. Both men didn't know how to react.

"You!" They both said in unison.


	10. Chapter 10

Hux couldn't tell how he was feeling. Some combination of angry, surprised, annoyed, curious, and relieved. Actually, cross off that last one. It was just comforting to see a familiar face, that's all. 

"Hux?" Kylo asked, looking shocked.

"Ren." Hux replied with begrudging resignation.

"I- what are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same." Hux didn't even try to act nice.

"This… is unexpected." The other man paused. "And, ah, its Ben now, by the way."

Hux was thoroughly confused. Last time he had called the supreme leader by his real name, he had received a death threat. Now he let everyone call him that? This confirmed Hux's suspicions. Something had definitely changed. But what?

"I… know how you must be feeling," Ben continued.

"What the hell makes you think you know how I feel? What I've been through?"

"Well, it's not any secret that you hate me."

"Wow, I'm so glad you noticed!"

"That, and I can feel your turmoil from miles away through the force, it's so apparent."

Hux was fuming. How dare this idiot try to understand? It made Hux even angrier that Ren- sorry,  _ Ben, _ seemed more calm and empathetic than anything. As if they didn't have years of bad history.

Ben spoke again. "Really, I don't blame you one bit. If anyone deserves it it's me."

"Lose the charade," Hux said.

"What do you mean?"

"What you're doing! Speaking to me like an equal, trying to make me feel bad for you!"

"I'm not trying to do anything. I know its hard to accept, but I've changed."

"And how so?"

Ben sighed. "I've found the light side again. I'm not Kylo Ren anymore."

"And you expect me to believe that you just woke up one day and decided to renounce the dark side?"

"No, I… I heard my mother again. Right before she died." Ben looked at the ground.

Oh. So that's why she had been absent this entire time. Why Finn and Poe were in charge. Hux looked to Ben, who was staring off into the distance. He looked so sad, so vulnerable. Hux couldn't believe this was the same man who insulted him every waking moment and stole his recognition time after time.

After a moment of silence, Ben continued. "And I saw my dad. He- he spoke to me. After all I had done, after what I had become, they still welcomed me back with open arms. I was done running from the truth, trying to convince myself I was something I was not. So I let go. Of my anger, my hurt, my lightsaber."

Hux found his features and voice softening in spite of himself. "So how did you get here? I knew you were on Exegol but I don't know what happened afterwards."

"It was Rey. The two of us, we are a dyad in the force. Together, we create balance. We defeated Palpatine, Hux. But it cost her life. I couldn't let that happen. So I transferred my life force to her. When she awoke, I felt myself slipping. But she held onto my hand. We kept transferring energy back and forth like a circuit, barely keeping each other alive. And here I am."

It was a lot to take in. Hux wanted to be angry, wanted to yell, but he couldn't bring himself to. Not in front of  _ this _ Ben, who seemed just as lost and hurt as him. Hux remained silent as Ben wiped his eyes.

Hux was being a jerk, but Ben didn't seem bothered by it. That made Hux feel some semblance of guilt. He wish he didn't. It would be easier that way.

"Hux… I'm sorry." Ben said.

"For what?"

"Everything. All this time, treating you like garbage when you were the best of us all along. Never letting you get your way. Hurting you. I've done so much to make you hate me. I don't blame you for lashing out at me. I've done a lot wrong."

"You know its going to take more than that for me to ever forgive you, right?"

"Yes, I know," Ben said quietly. "But would you at least give me a chance?"

Hux looked at Ben to find that Ben was already looking at him. The two just looked at each other for a moment. Hux noticed how calming Ben's deep brown eyes were when they weren't full of rage. Hux quickly averted his gaze, having already drawn out the eye contact far too much for his liking. 

"We will see," Hux replied.

The two sat in uncomfortable silence for a while. Neither of them were at each other's throats at the moment, but they weren't exactly grateful for each other's company either. 

Hux didn't know what to think. Ben- it was weird to call him that- had actually apologized for his actions. Before he never would have done that, much less even acknowledge that he had done anything wrong. Hux supposed he was at fault too for some things. He had taken lives when unnecessary, and was never kind to a soul. But everyone since he came to Ajan Kloss had been kind to him. Even Finn seemed to forgive him now. And here was Ben, the cause of a great deal of Hux's misery, trying to redeem himself. 

"So where is the girl- Rey, then?" Hux asked, breaking the silence.

"My injuries were worse than hers. She left yesterday on a pilgrimage to Tatooine. She wanted to pay her respects to my mother and Luke Skywalker. The medics insist that I rest for a few more days." Ben thought for a moment. "So, why are you here? I never would have thought that you of all people would defect."

"I didn't have a choice. I was the spy. I did it because-"

"-Because you wanted me to fail?"

"...Yes. I was willing to do anything to see you gone. But I helped some resistance members escape from our ship. Pryde knew I had betrayed the First Order. He tried to kill me. I survived, and the only place I could turn to was here. Pryde died believing I was dead."

"But why help the resistance?"

"Same as you, in a way. I realized how little the First Order cared about me. I was expendable. They cast me out, and I swung back full force. I decided to make my own path, instead of treading the one forged for me."

"And do you still want me dead?" Ben said this with such calmness that Hux was thrown off. How to respond? With honesty, he supposed.

"I don't know, " Hux confessed, voice barely audible. He refused to make eye contact with Ben. Out of shame or uncertainty, he didn't know.

Ben didn't speak another word, but nodded slowly instead. Then he laid back down and turned away from Hux.

Hux retreated back into his own space, closing the curtain. He spent a moment staring at the ceiling. Then he reached under his pillow and retrieved the knife, which he had hidden there. Hux managed to stash it before Nora had insisted that he changed into the standard clothing for all of her patients, plain sweatpants and a thin, breathable shirt.

He studied the blade. He could kill Ben right now and be done with it. But he couldn't. Hux cursed himself for his weakness. He finally had what he wanted. He could finally best Ben. But Hux let sympathy ruin it. What would his father say now?

No. He wouldn't let his father dictate his actions from beyond the grave anymore. Brendol Hux was dead. And so was Armitage's need for revenge.

Hux made his decision. He pried open the window next to his bed and tossed the knife out. He refused to hold on any longer. Hux would figure out who he was in time. But he certainly wasn't the ruthless killer his training made him to be. He was not his father. He was not General Hux of the First Order. Just Armitage. And that would have to be enough.


	11. Chapter 11

The next morning, Hux awoke and went through the little daily routine he had made for himself while in the medical bay. He'd switch his clothes with the fresh ones Nora set on the end of his bed every night. Then, he'd use a provided handheld mirror and toiletries to shave, brush his teeth, etc. Up until now, Hux had insisted on combing and fixing his hair like usual, precise and proper. But today, he willed himself to stop conforming to a regulation that no longer existed, instead opting to simply brush it and let it lay naturally. 

Then as usual, Nora arrived for his morning checkup. 

"Good morning Armitage!" She greeted. Hux only allowed Nora to call him that because she was a sweet older lady and he couldn't bring himself to tell her otherwise.

Hux heard the snort next to him clear as day now that the curtain partition had been removed. "Armitage? That's your name?" Ben asked with amusement.

Hux glared at him. "Yes, it is. And if you call me that in front of anyone, I will stab you." Hux would never admit that he was embarrassed in that moment.

"Okay, alright. I'm sorry." Ben was still smiling, clearly not intimidated. It occurred to Hux that he had never seen an expression of joy on the man's face. "But actually, I kind of like it. It suits you."

The unexpected compliment made Hux feel odd. He let Ben's giggles die out, focusing on Nora as she proceeded through the checkup. As she spoke, Hux brushed the hair out of his face, not used to it being in his line of sight.

"Look at that!" The woman remarked as she removed yesterday's bandages. "Almost as good as new!"

Hux looked down at his leg. Sure enough, the gash had nearly healed. A good portion of it was scarring over, and the rest was nearly closed up.

"The scars will go away soon thanks to the gel," Nora explained. "Now, should we see if today's the day?"

Hux was more than ready to walk again. "Of course."

With that, Hux swiveled his legs over the side of the bed, placing his bare feet on the cold floor. Just like the last two days, Hux began to stand up. Usually he immediately sat back down, the muscles in his leg too weak and hurt to work. But this time, he stood up with a great deal of wobbling. At last he was standing up, with only minor pain and fatigue.

"I think I've got it," Hux told Nora. Then he immediately started to fall over.

Nora reached out to catch Hux, but Ben slid out of his bed and beat her to it. Hux promptly fell into Ben's arms. 

Hux was startled by their sudden proximity. He was grasping onto the warm skin of Ben's bare arms, and their faces were uncomfortably close.

Hux pulled away abruptly, clearing his throat and turning away to lean on his own bed for support. He could feel heat rise in his cheeks.  _ What the hell? _

__ "Thank you Ben," Nora said. She turned to address Hux. "You're still a bit weak, but I think with some support you'll be fine. Now, I don't have crutches available right now, but if you give me an hour or two I can get some. Otherwise, someone can just help you get around."

"Just someone for support is fine for now," Hux said hastily. He was itching to move around, and he was comfortable enough with the nurses that it wouldn't be that bad if one of them helped him. 

"Okay then. Ben, would you mind helping Armitage get some fresh air? You seem to be doing fine this morning, and it would do you some good to get out too."

Ben looked a bit surprised by the request. "Sure," he said with a sigh. Hux could tell that he was definitely not sure.

"Well then, it's settled. I'm discharging both of you. But Armitage, I'll have to ask you to visit me daily so that I can monitor the healing process."

"Understood, ma'am. Thank you."

Nora smiled. "Of course. Now, let me get the two of you some proper clothes." With that, Nora left the room.

"Wow," Ben said.

"What?" Hux asked defensively.

"Look at you, being all cordial and gentle."

"Yes, well, you could stand to be some of that as well."

"Oh, my sincerest apologies,  _ Armitage." _

"You arse."

Nora returned, cutting their little spat short. They thanked her for the clothes and pulled their curtains for privacy. These clothes were very similar to the ones Hux was given previously. He had been on the base long enough now that they weren't so strange to him anymore. They were actually quite comfortable, at least more so than a stiff uniform.

The two got dressed and opened the curtains again. Ben was wearing tan boots, army green loose fitting pants, a long sleeved grey shirt, and a vest made of light material that Hux thought looked reminiscent of the robes jedi used to wear often. Hux thought he looked much more relaxed and comfortable than he ever did in layers of heavy black robes. Somehow, this felt more like Ben.

After some awkward shuffling around, Hux managed to put his arm around Ben's shoulders, leaning on him for balance. He regretted his decision already, and refused to look at Ben directly. They made their way through the base's corridors, bumping into each other and both feeling equally out of place.

When they made it outside, Hux took a deep breath and took in the sun's warmth. Ben seems to be doing the same, and for a brief moment there was peace between the two. But of course, being forced near each other so much made sure it was short.

"This is nice," Ben spoke up. "Its so peaceful when you stop talking for more than five minutes."

"And here I thought you were trying to be nicer."

"I am being nice. I could drop you right now, but I'm not."

"Shut up."

They continued on through the clearing, taking in their surroundings. Everywhere Hux looked, people still seemed to be celebrating. Several groups were gathered, all chatting happily and making jokes. Some friends sat together and shared a drink. Others were playing some sort of lawn game on the ground. It was all so simple and lively. That was something Hux felt he would never get used to. There were no squadrons preparing for combat, no battalions marching in step. Just life in its barest and most enjoyable form.

As Ben and Hux made their way around, several people gave their thanks. Glasses were raised to them for their help. Some called them heroes. Such praise was foreign to Hux. At the time he had acted mostly in self interest, but nonetheless these people were grateful. Back in the First Order, all he would have received was maybe a brief and vague comment on his performance. Here, he felt appreciated. Welcomed. It felt… nice.

What wasn't nice, though, was Ben's constant teasing and bickering. Still, Hux supposed it was better than the violent outbursts he was accustomed to witnessing. Hux still couldn't get used to just how much Ben seemed to have changed. It was sort of pleasant, in a way. Maybe Hux was getting soft. Ugh.

Nora eventually found them and handed Hux his crutches. Hux was thankful to finally let go of Ben. The close contact made him squirm a little, although he couldn't pinpoint why. Was it discomfort from being around Ben? Was he just not used to positive contact? Hux couldn't tell.

"So," Ben said. "Shall we continue?"

Ben still wanted to walk with him? Hux didn't have a clue as to why he'd want to do that. He thought for sure that Ben would take the chance to leave his side as soon as he could. Hux supposed he couldn't complain. After all, there was no one else here he knew well enough to interact with.

"I suppose so."

And with that, the two men continued through the trees.


	12. Chapter 12

Hux was annoyed. The thing was, he couldn't tell why. Something about being next to Ben, who was at the moment quietly enjoying the scenery and  _ not _ trying to undermine Hux, he supposed. This all seemed was too simple, too easy. Ben's attitude towards Hux had done a complete 180 in the spanse of a few days. Hux refused to believe that Ben was willing to let go of their past feuds so easily. Hux certainly didn't think he was worthy of that forgiveness. But he did know it wasn't because of the innocent look of content on Ben's face, or the way it was bathed in golden sunlight, highlighting his eyes. No, definitely not.

As they kept walking, both of them made a point to keep a distance. Having their arms literally wrapped around each other for a while was already enough awkwardness for the day. Hux used the crutches as well as he could, determined not to fall behind. Ben may only be a few inches taller, but his stride was definitely wider.

After some time of somewhat uncomfortable silence, Hux heard footsteps in the foliage behind them. He turned around quickly on alert, and Ben did the same. They both relaxed when they realized it was Rey. It seems they both had trouble forgetting that they weren't constantly in danger anymore.

Rey waved. "Hello, Ben!" She stopped in front of them and looked at Hux. "Oh, you're up too! That's good! Poe and Finn told me all about how you helped us win. Thank you."

"You seem rather happy to see me, considering I tried to have you killed numerous times," Hux replied.

"Well you're here now, aren't you? That's all that really matters." She smiled.

"Did you find the Lars' old farm?" Ben asked.

"I did. It was quite eerie, actually. No one else was around except for a kind old woman who I spoke to. She said everyone had left long ago."

"I see. And the lightsabers?"

"Covered and buried in the sand, just like we discussed. They can rest in peace along with Master Luke and Leia. Oh! That reminds me," she exclaimed, grabbing the object attached to her hip. She held it out for Ben and Hux to see.

"You built your own lightsaber?" Ben asked.

"Yes, on Tatooine. I repurposed part of my staff to make it," she explained, showing off the hilt.

"What color is the blade?"

"Here, let me show you!"

Hux watched in fascination as Rey stepped back and ignited the lightsaber. His intrigue only heightened when the blade appeared to be a vibrant yellow. He didn't really know how the colors of kyber crystals worked, his only experience with them being when Illum was turned into starkiller base, but he had only ever seen ones that produced red, green, blue, and purple hues. He could tell there was something special about the lightsaber and the person who wielded it.

"I've never seen a yellow blade," Ben remarked.

"I know, I didn't even think it was possible!" Rey replied.

"I guess I should think about creating a new one too."

"Well, actually…" Rey rummaged through her satchel, and produced a handful of various parts. 

Ben's eyes widened in recognition, and he gingerly took the parts from Ray's hands. "Is this-"

"Yes, pieces of your old lightsaber, from back when you trained under Luke. When I was in your quarters on the star destroyer, I found what was left of it while I was looking for the dagger. Something about it made me feel like I should take it, so I did. Turns out it was for a reason."

Ben turned to Hux to explain. "I took my lightsaber with me when I joined Snoke. After I crafted my other one, I couldn't stand to look at the old saber. Too many memories. So I smashed it to pieces. But I could never bring myself to throw it away. So the intact parts stayed in my quarters."

"You know, you could rebuild it," Rey mentioned.

"I could… but I don't have the rest of it. Or a kyber crystal."

"Don't worry, I already thought of that!" Rey rummaged through her bag again, this time handing Ben various parts and a small, transparent crystal. It was clearly kyber, that much Hux could tell. "They're left over from when I built mine."

"Alright then. I need to find somewhere quiet." Ben announced. He turned to Hux. "You can come, if you want."

In truth, Hux very much wanted to see how a lightsaber was crafted. It was a process that alluded him, and he hated not knowing. Unfortunately it was with Ben, but his curiosity got the best of him.

"I suppose," Hux replied, trying to mask his excitement. "It's not like I have much else to do. Lead the way."

The three of them entered the jungle, with Ben in the lead. 

***

Hux was growing tired of the walk. For several minutes now, he had to navigate his crutches through the thick plants and mud of the forest floor. He was about to protest going further when Ben came to a stop.

"I think this is it," Ben said. "It feels right."

Hux wanted to ask what the hell that meant, but bit his tongue on the matter. Instead, he watched as Ben carefully sat down and arranged all of the parts in front of him. There seems to be a certain order to it, but Hux couldn't figure out what it was. 

"Give him some space," Rey said, backing up and gesturing for Hux to do the same. 

Ben held the kyber crystal in his hand. He studied it for a moment, then closed his eyes. He just sat there like that.

"What is he-"

"Shh, don't break his concentration."

Just then, the crystal began to glow. Hux watched in amazement as its color began to shift, eventually becoming a brilliant purple. It cast a soft glow on Ben's face, making him look almost ethereal.

Without opening his eyes, Ben set the crystal among the other pieces. Then, they all began to levitate in front of him. Hux didn't dare look away, wanting to witness what was unfolding. Slowly, the parts rearranged themselves while suspended in the air. They ended up in a row, with the crystal in the center. The pieces combined, layering over the crystal and then forming the hilt. Once the lightsaber was complete, it gently floated into Ben's open hands.

Ben opened his eyes. For a brief moment his gaze caught Hux's. Hux looked away as he felt himself blush again.  _ Okay, no. _ That wasn't okay. That couldn't be right. Nope. Not one bit.

Ben stood up and examined the hilt he had created. Then he extended his arm and ignited the blade.

It sent chills down Hux's spine. The rumbling sound echoing through the trees. The bright purple casting light and shadows everywhere. The fact that he had witnessed something so compelling, so mystical to his logical mind.

Ben smiled and shut of the lightsaber, placing it through an empty loop on his belt. "Purple… not what I expected."

"But it makes sense," Rey said. "Such a color usually belongs to force users who walk between the dark and the light, and focus more on offense than defense."

"Is that really how I fight?"

"From experience, I can say yes."

Ben hummed. "Well, the more you know."

"Do all colors have a meaning?" Hux asked. The other two were so focused on their conversation that they had nearly forgotten Hux was there. He didn't know how he felt about that.

"Yes," Ben answered. "Rey's, for example, usually means that the wielder has great strength and connection with the force. Yellow is extremely rare. Few force users with such a color have been recorded. But it's not surprising, considering she's descended from Palpatine and also a part of the dyad."

"I see."

Rey spoke up. "We should head back. We don't want to worry anyone."

"You're right," Ben agreed. "Let's go."

And so they headed back to the base. Hux concluded that he hated the crutches.


	13. Chapter 13

That night, Hux made his way to the mess hall for the first time. Thankfully, it wasn't very hard to find. Light poured through the open doorway and numerous voices could be heard as he approached. Hux took a moment to straighten himself before entering. This was a room mostly full of strangers, and first impressions were key.

The mess hall was overwhelming for the senses. Strings of lights and lanterns hung from the ceiling, bathing the room in many colors. On one side, there were several tables with all sorts of fragrant and delicious looking dishes. Some people stood by to help give out portions of the spread, and many were lined up to get their food. Cooks rushed in an out of the kitchen, refilling the empty platters with more seasoned vegetables, roasted meats, and sweet pastries. The rest of the room was filled with rows and rows of tables, on which everyone sat and enjoyed their meals. The space was full of laughter and smiles.  _ Is this what home feels like? _

Hux wouldn't know. His mealtimes on the star destroyer were nothing more than a means to fuel his body. The cafeterias were nothing but blank metal walls, with a few uncomfortable tables and seats scattered throughout. Everyone ate the bland food in silence, finding no comfort in their plates of boiled protein and soggy greens. But the sight before him was vibrant and lively, much like the people of the resistance themselves.

Hux felt very much out of place, but the various smells of the food beckoned him to the serving tables anyways. He grabbed a plate and went through the line. Hux had never had so many choices in what he ate, and he didn't know where to begin. He began by sticking to things that were familiar, things reminiscent of his old regulated diet. But some of the more foreign dishes tempted him. He would sometimes ask what they were, and then decide to add some of it to his plate. By the time had made it through the line, he was more than content with what he had chosen.

Now, where to sit? Hux scanned the tables, looking for a spot. He noticed that one of the tables seemed to attract the leading members of the group. At that table, Poe, Finn, Rey, Rose, and Jannah were all gathered and conversing. Hux didn't want to intrude uninvited, and he doubted they were very interested in talking to him anyways. He settled on finding some corner to disappear to and made his way through the crowd. He was about to beeline to an empty seat when Poe caught his attention. "Hey! Come sit with us, we've got room!"

"Are you sure? You shouldn't feel obligated because you pity me."

"Nonsense! Sit down, I insist!"

Hux reluctantly approached the nearest available spot at their table and sat down.

"Looks like someone's hungry!" Poe remarked, referring to Hux's full plate. 

"I don't blame him," said Finn. "When I first defected, I couldn't believe how much food I could have. I nearly made myself sick the first week because I wanted to try everything!"

"Me too," Jannah added. "After my company deserted I learned how to cook all sorts of things. I can't imagine ever going back to rations."

Hux took his first bite of food and savored the flavors. He had never tasted something so good. 

His face must have shown it, because Rose noticed. "If you like that, you should try some of Orin's mash. He refuses to say what's in it, which is probably for the best, but it's really good."

Hux's mouth was full, so he just shook his head. He noticed the abandoned plate next to his. "Is someone sitting there?" He asked, nodding his head towards the spot next to him. 

"Oh, yes. That's Ben's plate. He just went to get something really quick." Rey answered.

Of course he had accidentally sat right next to the one person on the planet he would rather avoid. Hux couldn't catch a break, could he? 

Almost right on cue, Ben returned and took his place. 

"Hux." He acknowledged.

"Ben." Hux greeted back.

That was the only thing they said to each other for a while. Hux was going to get a migraine if he argued with that man one more time today. Plus, for once he was actually enjoying his food, so he was fine just listening.

Hux was engrossed in his own thoughts when Finn spoke up.

"You know, if Hux hadn't been there to help me, I wouldn't have been able to take down the tower nearly as fast as we did." Finn addressed Hux. "Speaking of which, I wanted to apologize. I judged you too harshly, but you've proved yourself. We're here partly because of your help. Thank you."

Poe raised his glass. "You're right. To Hux, for risking his life to do what was right."

The rest of the table, and even some people from the surrounding tables raised their drinks in a toast. "To Hux!"

Hux noticed that Ben barely mumbled the words, only slightly tipping his cup upwards. Still, Hux was astonished. As far as he was concerned he hadn't done anything intentionally to help these people. He did his part for his own gain, not theirs. At the time, he would have thrown them to the wolves in a heartbeat. Was that still the case? Perhaps not. He didn't want to think about it.

The conversations and eating continued for a while, and Hux felt himself slowly relaxing, despite Ben being very much in his personal bubble. But then again, Hux's personal bubble was about five yards in all directions, so nothing could be done about it. He tried to ignore the deep laughter emanating from Ben's chest, and the way his face lit up as Rey dramatically told of their battle with Palpatine. Yes, Ben was entirely too close.

Once the commotion in the room died down significantly, Poe stood up. "Everyone, I have an announcement!" He waited for the conversations to stop. "Thanks to everyone in this room, the Emperor and his fleet have been defeated." There were thunderous cheers. "For the past week, the galaxy had been able to rest knowing that there is peace. This is a momentous occasion unparalleled by any recent history. And so, General Finn and I have decided that in three days, there will be a galaxy wide party to celebrate."

The room bubbled with reactions. "We have already contacted the head planets of each system. They have all agreed to spread the message to every planet within their systems. People from various planets have already requested to join us here on Ajan Kloss. The rest of the galaxy will hold their own celebrations at home. We have those three days to prepare for our guests and make this party the memory of the decade. Are you all with me?"

It could be confidently said that the answer was yes. Everyone in the room cheered and applauded, fueled with excitement and pride. The joy was contagious, and Hux couldn't help but smile a little as he drank. Ben clearly noticed and raised his brows at Hux. Hux shot him a warning look back.

Hux decide to slip away to his room in the chaos. He could have sworn he heard Ben mutter a quiet "goodnight" as he walked away. Maybe he misheard. Either way, he didn't bother saying anything back. He exited the mess hall with his crutches and walked down the dark halls alone.

***

As Hux neared his room, he heard footsteps behind him. He turned as quickly as his crutches would allow and was met to a punch to the face. Caught unawares, he was knocked onto the floor.  _ Serves me right for letting down my guard. _ It was too dark to see his assailant, but their pitch silhouette looked female. Besides that, he couldn't tell their species or what they looked like.

"Who do you think you are?" Hux asked angrily, holding a hand to his jaw.

"I'll tell you who I am," the female voice said, delivering a swift kick to Hux's ribs. "A hell of a lot better officer than you are. Or should I say,  _ were?" _

Hux calculated the situation, trying to ignore the pain. Who was she? Was she a spy? A traitor to the resistance? A sympathizer of Palpatine?

Before Hux could think through it, the mystery woman kicked him again. "How dare you betray the First Order? We all thought you were gone, but this is even worse. You're pathetic. You owe us your life. Because of you, most of us are dead!"

Hux managed to roll out of the way of the next kick. His attacker's anger slowed her hits and made her predictable. Even still, he couldn't get up on his own.

Whoever it was continued her rant. "You think you've won? You haven't. The First Order may be gone, but what remains of it is still out there, and hungry for blood!"

She stepped on Hux's chest, pinning him in place. "Your's will be a good start, traitor." Hux heard the unsheathing of a dagger. "The great General Hux, dying a pitiful death by my ha-"

"Hey!" A voice yelled, its owner rushing down the hall.  _ Ben? _

The mystery woman cursed and put away her blade. She ran down the hall and disappeared into the darkness.

Ben stopped at Hux's side, checking the damage. "Who was that?"

"I don't know. But she was a First Order soldier, and is most likely hiding among us." The base was the only civilization on the planet. She had to be hiding in plain sight. 

"Shit," Ben huffed under his breath. "We need move. Is you room nearby?"

Hux wheezed. His ribs would definitely be bruised. "Yes. Three doors down."

"Okay, I'm right across from you. Let's go." He moved to scoop up the hurt man.

"Absolutely not, don't you fucking da-"

Ben ignored him and lifted Hux up. Hux cursed at him as he was carried to his room. 

Ben placed him on the cot. "Do you need me to get someone?"

"No! I can care for myself just fine, thank you very much!"

"Alright, alright."

"Just go!" He couldn't bear for Ben of all people to see him like this. He probably looked so disgraceful, so useless.

"Fine." Ben said coldly. He left the room without another word.

Hux patched himself up. He still had some supplies in his room from his first day on base, so he did what he could. There wouldn't be any long term damage, just some nasty bruising and tender muscles.

Hux considered how he acted. Ben had only tried to help, and all Hux could do was yell at him. For heaven's sake, he might have saved his life! Hux was angry at himself. He had let his pride and grudge against Ben overtake him. What an absolute idiot he was. He probably looked like such an insensitive fool. He didn't know when he started caring what Ben thought, but he still felt guilty nonetheless.

"What's wrong with me?" Hux asked himself, rubbing his temples. He kicked the foot of his cot in frustration. Sleep would not be easy tonight.


	14. Chapter 14

Hux was exhausted. He had barely slept at all, his guilt and inner conflict eating away at his consciousness all night. The sun had just risen when he gave up on sleep. Instead, he got up and went to Ben's room, right across the hall like he said. Even though Ben was infuriating sometimes, he was all Hux really had left. Now that he had the courage to admit that, he knew he had to do something. He had to make this right.

Thankfully, his leg had healed enough finally that Hux could walk without crutches. Good riddance.

Hux knocked on the door.

"What?" Ben asked, sounding short tempered.

"It's me," Hux replied. "May I come in?"

There was no reply, but the door slid open. Ben was sitting on his own cot, looking just as bothered as Hux felt. "What do you want?"

Hux swallowed, trying to get the words out. "I wanted to talk about last night. I acted wrongfully. I shouldn't have yelled at you."

"Damn right you shouldn't have."

Hux sighed. "Look, I want to apologize. I was being a hardass and an idiot."

"You realize it's going to take more than that for me to forgive you, right?" Ben said, intentionally echoing Hux's words from when they were in the med bay.

"I'm trying to fix things. Why can't you just let me?"

"This whole time, I've been trying to play nice! You've been nothing but mean to me but despite that I was trying to get along. I don't understand why you have to be this way!"

"No, you don't understand! You know why? Because you had parents that loved you! You had an uncle that strove to make you the best you could be, and peers that looked up to you! You were shown nothing but kindness in your youth! You know what I had? A mother I never knew, a father who hated my guts because I was an illegitimate child, and superior officers telling me how useless I was! While you were given love and support, I was given bruises and punishment!"

"Hux, I-"

"No, I'm not done! Even in the First Order, you didn't realize how good you had it. You were Snoke's favorite, a child of destiny. He gave you everything you wanted, practically handed you praise on a silver platter! You were given the promotions, you were given the respect, and you were given the power. I was nothing more than a tool! I was forced to give my life to the Cause without anything in return! No one cared about me! No one ever saw my accomplishments, just my faults. No one questioned you! And do you know who took the blame when you made a mistake? I was the one who received broken bones and split lips, not you!"

Hux realized his eyes were tearing up. "So that is why I have to be this way. It's the only way I've survived."

Ben looked overwhelmed, like he had too much to say but couldn't get it out. "I… you're right." He stood up. Was he crying too? "I had no idea… I never knew what happened to you, what went on when no one was looking. I didn't realize the severity."

Ben's breath caught in his throat. "I'm sorry. I don't know what it's like to be you. I've expected entirely to much, not realizing how hard it was for you to move on."

Hux was hurt, but looking at the man before him, brows knitted with pity and concern, he couldn't bring himself to be mad at Ben. He had come to make things better. He refused to leave things worse. He couldn't keep running from his issues.

"And I'm sorry too. You saved my life. You've proven that you've changed. But I can't fathom why you'd ever care about treating a miserable wretch like me with kindness. It's more than I deserve. But I should be grateful."

"I care because you changed too, Hux. You might not realize it, but you have. This whole time, you could have killed me anyways. But you didn't. I've seen you show kindness to others for the first time. People respect what you've done for them. And everyone deserves second chances. I know that now. I didn't think I served it either, but here I am."

"I guess I don't know how to handle that. I've never been given a chance. Forgiveness is not something I know well."

"Well, maybe now is a good time for you to start." Ben put his hand on Hux's shoulder. Hux could feel his ears turning red.  _ Really? Right now?  _ "Can we agree to move forward?"

"Yes. I will try."

"And that's all anyone can ask. And I'll try to be a little more understanding."

Hux nodded. "Thank you."

"No, thank you, for helping realize how ignorant I've been." Ben removed his hand. "Now, how does breakfast sound? If you're hungry?" He looked unsure of himself. 

"I wouldn't object."

And so they left the room together, the space between them as they walked not quite as large as before.

***

The next two days went by fast. The base was a whirlwind of commotion, everyone lending a hand to prepare for the celebration. Some temporary lodgings had been set up to accommodate their guests, and an outdoor pavilion covered by a tarp roof had been resurrected to host the party. Shipments of all sorts of goods had been sent in from across the galaxy. Many wealthy supporters had wanted to chip in with the event by sending food, clothing, decorations, and more out of the kindness of their hearts. One dignitary even sent some large holo tables, so that people from other planets could see the party on Ajan kLoss and converse with its inhabitants.

Hux had been kept busy, being pulled back and forth from several projects. He found that people liked having his expertise. He was not a stranger to parties, having being forced to attend some stiff galas during his career, but nothing like this. Nonetheless, the rodian he had been helping insisted that he had good tastes. Unlike before, he accepted the compliments instead of letting them wash over him. Either way, he still felt proud when his work on the pavillion was done.

It was the day of, and the finishing touches had been completed right as the sun began to set. Satisfied with the state of things, Hux headed back to his room to change. Surely, this evening would be special. At least, that's what the weird gut feeling he had told him.

When he made it back to his room, Hux found that some formal attire had been placed on his cot. Very few people on base had more formal clothes, so they had been gifted several crates of such fineries so everyone could dress up.

Hux unfolded the clothing and examined it. There were standard black shoes and dress pants, a white formal shirt, and a matching black vest. What caught his eye, though, was the midnight blue tailcoat. It was made of a thick velvety fabric, and on the lapel there was a stark white flower already attached. He admired the coat, deciding it suited him quite well. He wondered who had picked out his outfit.

He got to work getting changed. The process was made easier by the fact that all of his injuries, cuts, and bruises were practically gone now, including the large bruise on his chest. Hux was relieved that the last reminder of his escape was gone.

Once he was wearing the full ensemble, Hux assessed his appearance in the mirror. He had grown used to wearing his hair down and loose, but decided to style it properly once more for the occasion. He decided his appearance was satisfactory, and made his way into the crowds.


	15. Chapter 15

As soon as Hux was outside, he was surrounded by people. Sentients of all species and planetary origins had come to Ajan Kloss for the festivities. Hux was amazed by the sheer number and diversity of the crowd. Since the resistance's numbers were dwindling at the time of the Battle of Exegol, the base hadn't been nearly this full of people in his entire time here.

He politely pushed his way through the mass, trying his best not to trip over gowns and bump into various limbs. Eventually his struggle paid off, and Hux arrived at the main pavilion. 

The pavilion was beautiful. Scarlet fabric served as its roof, and the stone pillars that held it up were a marbled champagne color. In the center was a paved dance floor, upon which many couples were dancing happily. There were some tables scattered around, all of which were decorated and held trays of finger food. The entire scene was accented by arrangements of fresh flowers from all over the galaxy (which Hux had a hand in making). Hux marveled at the charity of others that provided it all. It seemed appropriate, since the donors no longer had to fear the First Order, or the Emperor. It was a jewel amongst the mud and grime of the planet.

Hux looked over the crowd, trying to find a face he knew. The first one he recognized was Rey's. He still didn't know her too well, but being surrounded by so many people left him in need of some semblance of familiarity.

Rey smiled and waved when she saw him approaching. "Nice to see you! I like your suit!" She said.

"Thank you," Hux replied. "Your gown is lovely."

Rey smiled and twirled in her dusty pink dress. "Thanks! It's pretty, but I will admit that I'm not used to wearing things like this. I'm not sure how I feel about it yet."

"That's alright, it might be nice to dress up just for a night." Hux looked around. "Where are the others?"

"Poe and Finn are greeting people, I think Jannah is with her company, Rose is busy preparing for something she refuses to tell us about and… Ben is walking towards us right now, coincidentally."

Hux turned around and was stunned. Before him was Ben, wearing a pure white suit with black accents. Attached to his shoulders was a cloak that draped over his back, and there was a red flower on his lapel, the same kind as the white one on Hux's. His hair was half tied back out of his face. He looked handsome and angelic and that pissed off Hux. Who gave him the right to make him feel this way? Hux tried to push it to the back of his mind.

Ben was the first to speak. "Good evening, Hux. You look good."

Hux though his chest was going to implode. It took him a second to respond. "Ah, you do too. You look… nice." What was he saying? Ben dresses nicely and suddenly he can't speak coherently?

"Thanks… You know, I've never really done anything like this. Partys, I mean. I thought training to be more important."

"Trust me, you weren't missing anything. First Order formal events were always so stiff and regulated. No one enjoyed themselves and if you were out of line you probably left with a major wound or one less limb."

"I think I'm going to go find Finn," Rey piped up. She quietly excused herself. The two men hardly noticed.

"Well this seems to be significantly more interesting than that," Ben continued.

"I hope so. Its impressive all considering, but terribly crowded."

Ben hummed in agreement. Just then, the music switched up and became an entirely new tune. Excited dance partners gathered on the floor and began a different dance. They switched partners at intervals in the song, and continued the steps.

"That looks fun," Ben commented.

"Not really my thing, but-"

"I don't know, I think you should!" Without warning, Ben pushed Hux into the throng of dancers.

"Oh no you don't! If I'm doing this, so are you!" Hux grabbed Ben's arm before he could get away, forcing him into the circle as well. Both of them were promptly swept up by dance partners.

The dance was quick paced, and it took Hux a while to get the steps. By the time he switched to his third partner, though, he had it down. He danced with all sort of people, all of them laughing and making comments to him as they spun. Normally doing such a thing would annoy him, but the energy the room was contagious and he was among kind people, not stuck up officers and military leaders. 

Just as the dance was coming to a close, Hux happened to end up dancing with Ben. The surprise made him lose his footing, but he soon got it back. He tried to hide how flustered he was, their arms around each other and bodies close. Hux though for a moment that he could see a dust of pink on Ben's cheeks too.  _ Must be the lighting. _

Hux was content and terrified at the same time. Now there was no denying that he was feeling something for Ben. Right now being in his embrace was nice, but at the same time facing how he felt made him uneasy.

The music stopped, and everyone dipped their partners. Ben followed suit, dipping Hux. Hux stood up and removed himself as quickly as he could, not wanting to prolong the pose. Both men looked at each other, out of breath. Ben was about to say something, then he heard a microphone turning on.

"Excuse me, everyone!" Rose said, getting the room's attention. "Tonight, we are all here because of the heroics and sacrifices of our leaders and their friends. And thanks to a generous gift from one of our supporters, I'd like to present these medals to them so that we may recognize what they have done not only for everyone here, but the whole galaxy!"

There was a round of resounding applause. "First I want to call up our brave generals, Poe Dameron and Finn, for leading us to victory and serving as a source of hope for all." They went and received their medals, thanking the crowd. 

"Next is Rey Skywalker and Ben Solo, who took on the enormous task of defeating Emperor Palpatine and succeeded!" Ben smiled and made his way to Rose. He nodded in thanks to her as she put the medal around his neck. Rey followed suit. 

"And lastly, Jannah and Armitage Hux, who without we wouldn't have been able to take down the Emperor's fleet!" 

Hux was surprised. Had he really earned this? He was also embarrassed that everyone now knew his first name.  _ How did she even figure that out?  _ Still, he approached Rose and accepted the medal. He took his place next to Ben as Jannah collected her's.

"Well, now every person in the galaxy knows your name,  _ Armitage _ ," Ben teased, nudging Hux.

"I swear if you don't stop talking-"

"Let's hear it for these individuals! They are the best of us!" Rose said. The cheers and clapping picked up once more. Hux was growing tired of being on display.

"Would you like to step away for a moment? Being surrounded by people for this long has been stifling." Hux offered.

"Sure, sounds kinda nice," Ben replied.

The two of them escaped through the crowd and slipped out of the pavilion. They opted to stroll through the edge of the forest, always keeping the base in sight. Hux didn't want a repeat of his first day here. They conversed pleasantly, but also teased each other relentlessly. Hux seemed ease, but his heart was fluttering. Ben looked just as good in the moonlight.

"Oh, I just remembered," said Ben. "Rey told me that she got the blessing from the spirits of Luke and my mother to train the next generation of force users. And she wants me to help."

"That's quite the responsibility, " Hux said as both men came to a halt.

"I know. It's a lot, but I feel like I should. I feel like I need to make up for preventing my peers from completing their training. I still feel guilty about it. They didn't deserve it."

"Hey," Hux said, getting Ben's attention. "You don't have to hold on to that anymore. You've made terrible mistakes. So have I. But we're here now. We are healing. And if I can see past what I've done, so can you. You would tell me the same, Ben."

"I guess you're right. It's hard though."

"It will always take time. Besides, I think you would make a great teacher."

"Really?"

"Yes. You're so kind, and gentle, and empathetic, and…" Hux found himself trailing off, noticing how Ben was looking at him with such fondness and appreciation.

"You know," Ben said, "I like it when you're nice. You should do it more." He took a step closer towards Hux.

"I-"

Suddenly, a great explosion came from the distance. The fire lit up the forest, and the sound shook the ground. 

"The base!" The both yelled in realization. They didn't waste another moment, both running back to the clearing.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that this is so late in the day, but with my schedule back to normal after the holidays I haven't had much time to write. That being said, I now have an editor who has made this process way easier and better, so thanks to them for the help! Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

Hux and Ben ran quickly, uncertainty and worry plaguing their minds. When they reached the clearing, they were greeted by screaming party guests and endless flames. The pavilion and temporary shelters were all engulfed by fire, and several wounded were lying on the ground, screaming for help.

It wasn't hard to find the source of the chaos. In the center of the ashes and ruin stood a handful of soldiers. Some were in full armor, others in only bits and pieces, but they each beared the all-too-familiar insignia of the First Order.

The two of them raced towards the enemy. As they got closer, Hux noticed who seemed to be the leader of the attackers. It was a chiss woman, armed to the teeth and clearly pleased with the scene before her. When she spoke, he knew it had to be the woman who had tried to kill him.

"There you are, _general._ And look! You even brought our fiasco of a Supreme Leader with you! Very efficient, as usual."

"What the hell have you done?" Hux asked.

"The only thing I can. What you were too weak to finish."

"Where did you and the others come from?" Said Ben, anger bubbling under his words.

"What, did you really think you had snuffed out all of us? What both of you fail to understand is that we are never truly gone. Not the First Order, not the Empire. While you tried to run from your pasts, they were waiting for the moment to bite back!"

The chiss woman lunged towards them, dagger in hand. Hux evaded and Ben quickly ignited his lightsaber. The woman and Ben circled each other like rabid animals waiting for the other to show the slightest sign of faltering.

"Both of you left us to die!" She barked at them. "We were just pawns in your game; playthings to throw out once you decided we weren't needed! You just decided to have a change of heart, did you now? And forget about us!?” The words were hurled at them full of hurt and anger. “You left behind your people, forgetting that the ones who built you up can just as easily rip you down!"

The woman charged at Ben in an angered attempt to strike him. She narrowly missed as Ben dodged and raised his weapon to block. And so they went back and forth, each neither getting the upper hand. As Hux watched from the panicked crowds, he could see the determination on Ben's face. He was countering her attacks well, but she was too quick for him to make any damage. Hux made use of himself and searched for a blaster, finding one amongst the rubble. He kept his distance and looked for an opening. 

Patience paid off and he saw his chance. Quickly, he aimed and fired, hitting the chiss on her hip. She shrieked in pain and knelt on the ground. Wasting no time, Ben ran up to her and held his lightsaber out in warning, preventing an escape.

"We need to hold her here until we can restrain her!" Hux yelled over the chaos and went to stand next to Ben. "Where's Rey? We could use her help right now!"

Ben closed his eyes for a moment. He must be trying to find her through their force connection. At least, that's what Hux figured.

"I know where she is," Ben finally answered. 

"Go get her, we'll need both of you to handle the rest of them! I'll make sure this woman stays here."

Ben ran off in search of Rey and Hux immediately stepped up to take Ben’s spot in front of the woman, holding his blaster close. He wouldn't give her the chance to escape.

The chiss remained kneeling, her hip slowly bleeding. 

"You might as well just tell me who you are," Hux addressed the captive, His voice laced with venom and control like it used to. "You won't win, and I sure as hell won't let you go."

The woman spat at Hux's feet, her face contorted with malice. "I refuse! I owe you nothing. Not anymore."

"I wouldn't make that a promise."

"Ha! You make threats, but still show me mercy. After all, you could just kill me and end it. You have no reason to preserve me. Have you really gotten so soft, so _weak_ that you can't even take a life? You truly are a disgrace! No wonder Pryde tried to kill you. I would have too!"

If Hux was honest, it was tempting. He held so much anger towards whoever she was. For once in his life Hux had felt some semblance of belonging, of family. And now, this crazed loyalist had come close to ruining that. He could destroy the source of all this suffering with a clean blow.

But where would that get him? It wouldn't change the fact that there were several more hostiles. And contrary to what the woman said, there was in fact a reason to keep her alive, not that she needed to know that yet. Plus, what would everyone think? The resistance had extended him kindness when there was no reason to. What would they say if they found that Hux was no better than before, still just a cold blooded killer? These were the only people he felt safe with. He couldn't put that at risk. _And_ _what would Ben think?_

"You mistake my ability to remain in control of myself for cowardice, which seems to be a skill you do not possess." Hux told the chiss.

He noticed too late when she suddenly lunged at his lower half, dagger poised with intent to slice his leg. Before he could react, the woman was launched backwards and away from Hux. Hux looked around for what had saved him and turned to see Rey and Ben rushing towards him, lightsabers in hand. Rey's dress was torn, and her hair was falling out of its meticulous style. Ben’s cape was torn as well and splattered with mud. Hux figured he probably didn't look much better.

"Was that one of you?" Hux asked the dyad when they arrived. 

"It was Ben," Rey said. "He saw you before I did."

Hux was about to thank him when he noticed the woman was getting up off the collapsed pillar she had landed on. Rey handled it immediately, pulling the chiss towards her with the force.

"You've done enough damage," Rey scolded her as she cuffed the woman. A fresh wave of soldiers entered the empty, charred remains of the pavilion and surrounded the area. 

"I'll handle them!" Ben told the others, and jumped into action. 

Rey was about to join him when she and Hux heard a crackling static. She began locating the source, eventually picking up a damaged communicator off the cracked dance floor tiles. 

A voice came through. "Is anyone there? Please, if someone can hear me we need help by the hangar!"

"I'll be right there," Rey answered. "Hux, can you take care of the prisoner and help Ben?"

"Yes."

Rey left immediately, knowing that each second wasted might mean another life lost. 

Hux began firing at the attackers, always keeping their leader close and in sight. Most of them had their faces covered. He wondered if he knew any of them. 

One by one, Ben and Hux took out the soldiers. They built a rhythm, both covering each other and taking the opportunities they set up for one another. Hux though they were in the final stretch.

He was wrong. One of the remaining enemies threw a grenade, aiming straight at Ben. 

"Ben, watch out!" Hux yelled , arm outstretched. Ben turned to him, about to move, when he found himself being pulled across the clearing towards Hux. He landed right in front of Hux, but fell as the blast from the grenade pushed him, clearly in shock.

Hux was also dumbfounded. "I- how- what was that?"

Ben stood up and looked at Hux, something dawning on him. "You just… you just used the force."

"...what?"

Neither of them had time to process, however, as the last dregs of the soldiers poised to attack in their moment of faltering. They returned back to the task at hand, shooting and slashing until they were finally safe. 

"Go help the others!" Hux told Ben.

Ben nodded and left the smoldering pavilion, leaving Hux and the woman alone.

"You do realize that there are more of us out there, right?" the chiss asked in defiance. Hux faced the lady with new found confidence.

"Yes, and that's why you are going to help us get to them."

***

Finally, the battle was over. The fires were slowly but surely being put out, and the wounded were carried away to be tended to. The entire base was a mess, tattered fineries and scorched flowers mixed with smoldering embers, blood on the soil, and the cries of people who had lost loved ones echoing through the night.

When everything stopped burning and the dead had been counted, the remaining people slowly filed off to their beds to attempt to rest. But the sun was about to rise, and everyone silently knew that trying to sleep was futile. Fatigue was not enough to lull the physically and mentally scarred into a slumber.

But Hux tried, trudging back to his room. Most of the exterior of the base was damaged but inside of it, which was built into the terrain, was relatively fine. The corridors were eerily quiet compared to the scene outside. To Hux's surprise, Ben was in the hall right outside of their rooms.

"There you are," Ben sighed, relaxing a bit. "I hope you don't mind, but we need to talk."

"I-sure," Hux replied. It's not like he was going to sleep anytime soon anyways.

"You do realize what you did, right?"

"I wish I hadn't… I mean, not saving you, that was quite a relief, actually. But everything just got a lot more… complicated."

"You're relieved that I'm safe?"

"Yes, and don't you dare make me say it again."

Ben laughed softly. Hux didn't realize how nice it was to hear that sound right now. "Okay, I get it. Anyways, have you ever done anything like that before? Did you know you were force sensitive?"

"No. I had no idea." Hux said tentatively.

"Have you ever had a strong gut feeling? Like something inside was telling you the way forward? Or like it was showing you what was meant to be?"

"Well… when I first arrived on Ajan Kloss. I had no way to navigate to the base. But something in me told me where to go. And earlier, before the party, I felt like something was going to happen. Something significant."

"I felt it too, but I dismissed it. I shouldn't have."

"We all could have done things differently. All that matters is that the threat is gone and the terrorists's leader is in a cell."

"I guess so…" there was a beat of silence. "You know, I could teach you, if you want." Ben offered.

"What?"

"I could help you learn how to use the force, and a lightsaber. After all, the younglings Rey And I are meant to teach will be arriving soon. You could join the lessons." Ben said half-jokingly.

"I'd rather not. I'm not ready to confront this, at least not yet. Besides, I'm no jedi. It wouldn't suit me."

"That's your choice. But, the offer will always stand. Now, I think we should at least try to sleep."

"Agreed," Hux said, heading to his door. 

"Oh, and Hux?" Ben spoke up once more. "Thank you for saving me."

"Well, I guess we're even now. And just call me Armitage, it's easier that way now."

Ben was taken aback. "Oh, okay. Goodnight Armitage."

Hearing Ben say his name, his _real_ name, made him feel a pang in his chest. This time, he didn't protest. "Goodnight, Ben."

Armitage went to his room and settled in. By the time he fell asleep, the sun was rising and a new day was beginning.


	17. Chapter 17

Armitage dreamt, and in his dream he was back in the throne room. However, the sight before him was drastically different from last time. He was now seated on the throne. He was dressed in an elaborate white and deep red outfit, with a long cape draped over the seat. Just as before, Armitage was seemingly glued in place. What he saw in the room was unsettling. 

Everything was in flames like last time. But amongst the roaring fires were the silhouettes of people, all screaming and cowering as the fire consumed them. The floor was littered with bodies and people who were so mutilated that they were almost indistinguishable from the corpses. Some wore the plain clothing of the resistance. Others bore the signature garb of the First Order. 

Mothers held their children tight, unable to stop the cries that emanated from the infants. Those who were alive and not screaming were reaching out to Armitage, arms outstretched and desperate pleas tumbling from their bloody lips. Armitage wanted to recoil, but his body would not permit it. He could only watch on in horror at all the pain and suffering. 

A small twi’lek child made her way to the foot of the throne. One of her lekku was gone and there was a large gash on her arm. She wore a colorful dress and one shoe.

"You did this," she told Armitage through trembling sobs. "You brought this on all of us. Because of your failure. You led them straight to us. My mother and I wanted to celebrate. Now we're dead"

Armitage could not respond.  _ I'm sorry,  _ he wanted to say.  _ I didn't think they would attack. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I should have known. _

Another figure approached behind the child. It was a stormtrooper. His armor was cracked and his hands bled. Armitage could see one of his eyes through a hole in his helmet. 

The trooper put a hand on the small girl's shoulder. "You killed us, general." He coughed through the smoke. "You let us all die. You murdered your own kind tonight. How does it feel, knowing you're responsible for deaths on both sides?"

Armitage wanted this to end. He tried to shake himself free, to speak, to move, to do anything other than watch this torture; the pain he'd brought upon everyone in the room.  _ Please, make it stop. _

The trooper continued, his voice coarse. "It doesn't matter who you're working with, all you do is bring destruction and death. That's all you have ever created . It's all your good for." He chuckled through shaky breaths. "You were stupid to think you were useful for anything else. How long do you think it will take your ‘friends’ to realize that?"

_ You're wrong, _ Armitage wanted to tell them.  _ I saved so many people. It was at the cost of my soldiers, but for the greater good. I can't control the actions of a few loyalists.The galaxy is better off now with the First and Final Order gone. _ But how long till the next attack? How many more would seek retribution for the destruction he left in his wake?

Just then, Armitage heard a piercing scream in a corner. It sounded so raw and intense that he couldn't help but shudder. Something was very wrong. He had to get to whoever it was. Armitage fought against his invisible bonds as hard as he could. They were stronger than last time. All he felt was a pressing feeling of despair and hopelessness. Still, Armitage tried.

The screams continued, and with each one Armitage grew closer and closer until he finally managed to break the bonds. He shot off the throne, pushing past the trooper and girl. As he stepped through the carnage, people grabbed on to his cape in desperation, weakly letting go as he ran past. Their desperate attempts left bloodstains on the pure cloth.

Armitage made it to the source of the cries and was filled with horror. His limbs trembled and his stomach churned. He knelt down.

Laying on the charred ground was Ben. He was covered in gaping, bleeding wounds. He was missing an arm, and there was a hole in his abdomen. Ben's face was covered in tears, burns, and a look of lucid terror.

"Armitage, please," Ben said meekly, grasping on to Armitage's sleeve. He looked ghostly and he spat out blood as he spoke. "I can't- please, help…"

Armitage didn't know what to do. "Ben, I can't- I don't- I dont know how to fix this," he stuttered out. Armitage felt like he might throw up. All he could do was cradle Ben in his arms. Ben's chest shook with his sobs. It tore Armitage's heart to witness and be unable to do anything.

"What do I do?" Armitage asked himself out loud, voice barely audible. He could feel tears forming in his eyes.

"There is nothing you can do," a rough voice spoke from behind Armitage.

Armitage stood up and turned to face Palpatine. The deceased Emperor grinned in triumph.

"You are worthless. You caused this, and you can do nothing to change it."

Palpatine's cackles and Ben's whimpers echoed through Armitage's head as he awoke.

***

Armitage jolted awake with such force that he fell out of bed, smacking his head on the hard floor. He groaned and held his forehead. He was covered in cold sweat and his heart was racing. He sat up straight and stared at the wall. Sunlight filtered through the window. It was entirely too bright.

All Armitage could do was sit there and try to process the horror he had witnessed. He was shaken to his core, a sensation he had never experienced and never wanted to again. He had seen violence in his lifetime, but that… that was all too much.  _ And Ben… _ He was helpless. All he did was sit there as Ben died in his arms. Armitage couldn't save him. He couldn't save the innocent people who had come to celebrate peace. He let the soldiers he grew up with and trained perish…

Armitage's door slid open. He looked up to find Ben in the doorway, and immediately realized how much of a mess he must look like at the moment. Armitage stood up and tried to hide the concerned look on his face.

"Did you have nightmares too?" Ben asked quietly, hesitant to enter.

"I- yes. I did." Armitage sighed. He couldn't look at Ben. All it did was bring bloody pictures back into his head. 

Slowly, Ben walked in and approached him. Armitage let him apprehensively. Ben sat on the edge of the cot and gestured for Armitage to do the same. 

Armitage sat on the opposite side, trying to keep his distance. He couldn't handle his feelings on top of everything else right now. He doubted Ben would appreciate him getting mushy anyways.

"Do you want to talk about it? I mean, you don't have to…" Ben trailed off.

"No, I'd rather not. It's just…" Armitage paused for a moment in thought. "It's just- I only seem to hurt when I try to help. I abandoned the people who trusted me to lead them. I helped kill most of the people I had ever known. And even now, when I try to make things right, I mess it up by giving who was left a chance to hurt others. All I can seem to do is cause massacres. It was foolish for me to think I belonged here. My presence can only end in destruction."

"Who the hell told you that?" Ben asked. He looked almost hurt that Armitage had said that about himself. Maybe that was wishful thinking. 

"No one did, but I-" Armitage felt Ben digging into his head.

"It was Palpatine, wasn't it? In your dream…" Ben searched deeper and gasped in surprise. "Oh… Kriff. Armitage, are you okay?" He asked, a new layer of worry covering his face.

"I'm perfectly fine, thank you." Armitage snapped, trying to keep up his facade.

"That's… your dream, it's awful. I mean mine was too, but yours…"

Armitage could still feel Ben lightly rifling through his memory. Ben was almost to the part where Armitage held him.  _ Oh hell no. Nope. _ Armitage quickly pushed back and tried blocking Ben from his mind. Surprisingly, it worked. 

"I hate it when you do that."

Ben seemed a little surprised too. "Sorry. I was just worried."

“Well don't be, I'm just fi-" right then, Armitage met Ben's eyes. He looked concerned, empathetic. The sunlight lit up his soft expression, and in the back of Armitage's head he could still picture that same face contorted in pain and begging for help that wouldn't come.

Armitage broke.

Against his will, water filled his eyes. He immediately tried to turn away and wipe his tears.  _ Absolutely ridiculous. _

Armitage heard shuffling from the other side of the bed and to his surprise, felt strong arms wrap around him. He stopped holding it in and let the tears flow freely, overwhelmed by the contact. He realized that in all his life he had never received anything as simple and comforting as a hug. The reassurance and warmth made him cry even more.

"You know, it's okay to not be okay sometimes." Ben said quietly.

"That's easy for you to say, you've never had to hold in your emotions to survive." Armitage’s voice was breaking with each word.

"Maybe not. But I promise that being upset doesn't make you weak."

Armitage couldn't find the strength to argue.

"And don't you dare say all that shit about yourself. If you do I might have to fight you personally until you stop blaming yourself."

"But I-"

"No, I won't have it. You are not responsible for what happened. They made their choice, and you made yours. You did what was right. That's all anyone can ask. It's their fault, not yours."

After a moment, Armitage calmed down. He slid away from Ben's embrace, embarrassed by the prolonged contact. Such displays were for lovestruck youth. He chastised himself for giving in to it in the moment. Armitage couldn't afford to convince himself that Ben felt the same way. It was stupid and only made things worse.

"Ugh. This is ridiculous." Armitage said. "Twice now I've cried in front of you."

"And how many times have you seen me throw a tantrum?" A small smile returning to Ben's face.

"I suppose that's fair."

"Don't worry, I promise not to tell."

The conversation faded. Eventually, Ben made his move to leave. Once Armitage was alone, he felt himself blush again. It frustrated him to no extent. Ben might just be the death of him,  _ but that wouldn't be so bad. _


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess what? I'm not dead and neither is this fic! I've just had a busy week and wasn't able to get out another chapter on time. To make up for it, I will be updating twice today. Thanks for your patience and enjoy!

After a few minutes of trying, Armitage finally gathered up enough will-power to move on with his day. It was early afternoon by now and there was far too much to do in the wake of the attack to remain idle. Armitage changed his clothes and made himself look presentable. Even if the last thing he wanted to do was face the aftermath, he knew it was inevitable.

Armitage exited the building and stepped into the daylight. The once green clearing was now marred by burnt foliage and charred trees. The faint smell of burning wood could still be detected in the breeze. The base, full of happiness and unity less than a day ago, was now barren and silent. The groups of friends he used to see talking and laughing were all gone, occupied by pressing matters. Only a few individuals milled about the area, picking up fallen branches and personal belongings that had been dropped in the chaos. Most of their guests had left earlier in the morning. The few stragglers were boarding their ships, anxious to leave the planet; a planet now scarred by combat and riddled with evidence of death. 

The mood was no less somber when Armitage made it to the generals' meeting room. As he suspected, both Finn and Poe were already inside, along with Rey and Ben. They were all seated around the main table. Their voices were drained of optimism and their shoulders carried the weight of the night's losses.

"Good morning, Hux," Poe greeted. "Although I can hardly say that 'good' is an accurate description."

Armitage took an empty seat at the table. "It's just Armitage now, please. May I ask what you were discussing?"

Poe hummed in surprise. "Alright then, Armitage. Right now, we're trying to find how to go forward from here. What happened at the party can't exactly be ignored."

Finn spoke up. "What happened last night changes things. As of now, we have no idea where the First Order troops came from, or how many more there are. We are in the dark."

"All we know is that they have to be stopped," Rey finished. "We’ve sacrificed too much to let them win now."

"About that," Armitage interjected. "That is why I ensured their leader's capture- I believe we can use her to lead us to the loyalists' main encampment."

"That's a lot to ride our chances on. What makes you think she'll give away their position?" Poe asked.

"We just happen to have one of the most efficient interrogators in the galaxy on our side," Armitage answered, nodding towards Ben. "And I assure you, I myself can be quite convincing. Conjointly, the two of us used to be on the same side as her. If anyone can get her to talk, its us."

"He has a point," Finn told Poe. "I say we give them a shot."

Poe sighed, thinking it over. "I agree. However, both of you have to promise to only do what is necessary. I won't tolerate unneeded violence."

"Of course. I understand," Armitage replied. He moved to stand up and leave. Ben did the same.

As they began to exit, Rey approached them and placed a hand on Ben's arm. Something about that annoyed Armitage.

"Please be careful," she told Ben sincerely. "Whatever you do, don't lose control."

"I'll be okay, I promise." Ben pulled away and followed Armitage out of the room.

They made their way down the hall, Ben leading the pair.

"You know, I never said I agreed to this," he told Armitage.

"And yet here you are alongside me."

"It's not like I have much of a choice. If we don't do this, we are all at risk again."

They walked in silence for a while before Ben spoke up yet again. "Rey and I have decided to go ahead with training padawans. They will be here in the next few days."

"Are you sure that's a good idea? The resistance may no longer be a safe place."

"Here is safer than where the younglings are now. Here, they can be protected and trained to defend themselves. Out in the galaxy, they are vulnerable. If the wrong person finds out who and where they are, they could be at higher risk."

"Perhaps you are right."

Ben feigned shock. "Did the mighty Armitage Hux just say I was right? I thought I'd never see the day."

"And if you continue being an idiot you'll never get to again."

Ben laughed. Armitage couldn't help but crack a minute smile.

Moments later they arrived at the prison cells. There were no more than three small cells in the room, only one of which was occupied. Armitage walked up to the guard stationed by the cell.

"Here's the prisoner sir," the young and awkward guard told him. "All of her confiscated belongings are on the table in the corner."

"Thank you," Armitage thanked the scrawny teen. "You can leave, we have this handled."

The guard left, head down as he passed the two imposing men. They had no intentions on coming off as threatening. Armitage forgot that they still carried the reputations of ruthless dictators. After all, that kid probably grew up hearing of their rise to infamy. Armitage wondered if he would have been as unsure and shy in his youth if he hadn't been melded into the perfect soldier as a child.

Ben moved over to the table, perusing through the various pieces of armor and equipment. He picked up a set of standard dog tags. "Her name is… Vora'eris'ianew. She was a captain."

"I see," Armitage acknowledged. He turned towards the occupied cell. "Captain Vora, I recommend that you comply with our orders. We'd rather not do anything extreme, but we will do what we must."

Eris stayed silent, glaring at the two men from her sitting position on the floor. She only wore the black shirt and pants issued to all armored soldiers, the rest having been confiscated. Her hip was messily bandaged. Armitage figured that she had demanded on dressing it herself. 

The prisoner did not react as Armitage continued. "Last night, you made a grave mistake. You and the others launched an attack on the very same group that is responsible for your downfall. And yet you had the gall to believe that you would come out on top." Armitage kneeled in front of the cell, now at eye level with the glaring captain. "This is your one and  _ only _ chance to make up for it."

Still, Eris did not speak. Armitage could feel her anger, diluted but ever present. Sensing other's emotions was new. He had so much to learn about the force, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to. Either way, now that he was aware of his capabilities they seemed to be more apparent.

"You will tell us the location of your base of operations and lead us there. If you do, the resistance might show mercy. If not, you can expect to rot in captivity. Lucky for you, the generals are very much against execution. Although, death might be preferred to the alternative…" Armitage was, of course, bluffing. He knew he could use his formidable past as leverage. However, even if part of him wanted to out of spite, the last thing he should do was hurt the prisoner. He wouldn't dare break the fragile trust he had earned.

There was no response from the captain. "I suggest you start talking," Armitage warned, standing back up. He turned to Ben, who was still rifling through the contents of the table. "Have you found anything useful?"

"No, not yet," Ben sighed in frustration.

"Very well then. Captain Vora, this is your last chance to speak willingly." No response.

Armitage felt the force guiding him again. He decided to follow it. After all, it had gotten him this far. He got as close as he dared to the cage and held out his arm towards Eris through the bars of the cell. Armitage concentrated hard and focused on her mind. 

After a moment of struggle he heard the captain gasp in surprise as he finally succeeded. A myriad of random images and snippets of conversation flooded Armitage. He tried his best to sort through the mess to find something useful. Eris was actively trying to block him out, causing his perception to flicker as he searched. He stumbled across a brief image of a face and a name to go with it.  _ Xander Imwe, human male, First Order flametrooper. _

The prisoner pushed back hard, and Armitage's connection went blank. That was fine. Armitage had what he needed. He stepped away from the chiss, who looked shaken from the mental intrusion.

"Ben, I don't suppose our dear prisoner had any photographs in her possession?" As he asked, he tried his best to project the mental image of the man he had seen to Ben. Apparently Ben had received it, because he quickly dug through a pile on the table and produced a small picture.

"Here you go," Ben passed the photo. Indeed, it was the same face Armitage saw in Eris's memory. Ben nodded in confirmation.

Armitage showed the picture to the captain. "Xander Imwe, isn't it? Surely he must be close to you for you to carry his likeness. I wonder what the relation is. A close friend? An adoptive sibling?" He paused and watched for a reaction. "Or, perhaps, a lover?" Her red eyes narrowed at that last suggestion. "Ah, I see. Well,  _ Captain Vora _ , if you comply I can guarantee his safety. If not, you can expect him to be taken down at all costs, along with the rest of you."

Finally, Eris responded. She scrambled to the bars and spat at the two men. "Fuck you!" She yelled. "I'll never tell you scum anything willingly!"

Armitage smiled. She had cracked, and was now vulnerable. This was their opportunity. 

"Ben, I hate to say this, but your assistance is necessary."

Ben's eyes lit up in understanding. He caught on to Armitage's plan and approached the cell. 

Armitage addressed the prisoner again. You said you wouldn't say anything willingly. Now, that may be true, but we don't need your willingness to get answers." He turned to Ben. "Just get what we need from her. Don't go overboard."

"Don't worry, I understand," Ben replied. With that, he got to work. He faced Eris, and she immediately reacted. Armitage could sense the force flowing through Ben as he dug through her mind himself. His training and connection to the force was far greater than Armitage's. He was their best bet. 

The chiss gripped the bars and strained as she tried to fight against Ben. Overwhelmed with emotion, she was much easier to read. Ben was clearly in control, searching the prisoner's head while making sure not to cause pain. Eris screamed in retaliation, sweat dripping down her face. This threw off Ben slightly, but he did not falter. After a few more seconds of mental warfare, he let her mind go.

"I've got it," Ben announced. "I know where they are."

Armitage looked at the disheveled woman. Her glare was almost intense enough to bore holes into his skull. "Thank you for your cooperation," Armitage said sarcastically with a haughty grin. "You can expect us to visit frequently."

Armitage and Ben left the room. A string of violent curses could be heard from the chiss as the door slid shut behind them. They made their way back through the corridors.

"So. Where are they?" Armitage queried.

Ben grimaced. "Unfortunately, Nal Hutta."


	19. Chapter 19

The news wasn't received well. Hutta was a toxic swamp planet controlled by the hutts for centuries. It was a cesspool of criminals and illegal activity, perfect for a band of terrorists looking to stay hidden and stockpile questionable supplies. And a massive headache for the generals who had to find them. Everyone present for the discussion agreed that it was best to weigh their options before attacking.

The next week was spent with breath held and tensions high. Everyone wondered when the next attack would come. The members of the base tried to fix the remaining damage and get back on their feet, but everyone felt the looming threat of the loyalists. Finn and Poe spent hours pouring over possibilities and calculations. Armitage visited Captain Vora often, attempting to learn more to no avail. Rey and Ben prepared for their students and waited.

Finally, their waiting came to an end. It was early one morning when the first ship arrived. Ben and Rey were the first to approach the vessel, with the rest of the group close behind. Everyone wanted to greet the padawans, to let them know that they were safe and welcome. That promise of safety was thin, but they promised it nevertheless. Armitage settled on watching from a distance, not wanting to scare the kids.

A ramp lowered and out came a togruta couple, each holding hands with their son. The child was apprehensive as he stepped onto the planet. He clutched onto his parents. 

Rey approached the child with a warm smile and soft tone. "Hello, little one. I'm Rey Skywalker. What's your name?"

The boy hid his face shyly. It was only after his mother gently nudged him forward that he spoke up. " I'm Taren, ma'am. Taren Nalen." He was around eight, Armitage figured, but small for his age. The patterns on his blue lekku and green face were very basic, revealing just how young he was.

"It's nice to meet you, Taren," Rey said, kneeling down to the boy's level. "I'm very glad that you've come." Rey pointed to Ben. "That's Ben Solo. He's going to be training you too."

As Armitage watched he could see how Ben tensed up, as if he expected the child to be frightened of him. To both of their surprise, Taren smiled at the man (with one tooth missing) and waved. It seemed that the boy was warming up to his new caretakers. Ben was taken aback by the positive reaction, but quickly returned the child's smile and introduced himself. Armitage watched Ben interact with the tiny kid. He made Taren laugh and slowly eased the boy's worries. His seemingly natural ability with children made Armitage's heart hum with affection. _It's kind of… adorable. Ugh_. even though Armitage had accepted that he had feelings for Ben, that didn't mean they were welcome. He just hoped no one could tell.

In the meantime Rey spoke to Taren's parents. They thanked her and asked some questions. Rey was happy to tell them that they could visit whenever they liked, and that their son would always be able to call them on a holo. Both Rey and Ben had decided to toss out the rules against maintaining relationships. They thought it important for the children to stay connected and make bonds, and as long as their attachments didn't turn to jealousy or fear it would be fine. They didn't want the kids to grow up isolated and distant like they did.

Eventually, the parents said goodbye to their son. Taren hugged them tightly and promised to talk to them all the time. When his parents finally left, he began to cry. Ben was quick to pick him up and comfort him. The rest of the base began greeting the youngling and making him feel better. In no time, Taren was happy again. 

The next few hours went by in a similar fashion, with ships dropping off children one by one. The Kids were numerous and diverse. Two rodian twins from wild space, the human daughter of a nobleman, a blind nautolan boy, a little cathar girl, and a mirialan teen who seemed to be gender nonconforming all made their way to Ajan Kloss. They were all greeted kindly and made welcome.

The last ship arrived around midday. This one looked old and beat up. It was covered in scratches and dents; the landing was bumpy. Everyone watched, wondering who could be inside. 

The first person to step out was a human boy in his late teens. He had a cybernetic implant in his left ear and several scars surrounding the area. Following behind him was a rattataki girl with several piercings and a zabrak boy with red skin. Some people began to whisper concerns to one another. This group was made of species often seen on enemy lines. Unlike the others, it was clear that these kids had had rough lives. _Where were their parents?_

The cyborg boy looked at the crowd with clear hesitance. Armitage didn't blame him, he knew that the teenager was probably used to negative reception. Armitage had the same worries when he arrived. 

All the same, Rey greeted the group. "Hello. What are your names? Do you have parents?"

"I'm Sy. That's Eizere, and that's Aunis," he explained, pointing to the rattataki and zabrak respectively. "As for parents, none that are alive as far as I'm aware."

"That's alright. I promise you are all safe and welcome here." Rey reassured the trio.

"Tell that to that lady over there who's starting at my friends like they're rancors."

Rey shot a glance at the guilty woman in the crowd, who was indeed upset by the presence of these particular kids. The lady quickly disappeared into the crowd to avoid confrontation.

"I'm terribly sorry, Sy." Rey apologized. "If anyone has anything to say about _any_ of my padawans, they'll have to answer to me. Who you are shouldn't matter. I'm here for you."

"And me too," Ben noted. "Trust me, I know what it's like to get dirty looks everywhere you go. We're here to change that."

"I sure hope so," Sy said, sounding skeptical. "We have nowhere else to go. This is our only chance."

"And it will work out, I promise." Rey motioned for the three younglings to follow her. "Let me show you where you'll be staying."

The trio followed her into the base. Once they were gone, the murmurs from the crowd picked up again. 

Ben looked around at the crowd. "If anyone has anything bad to say about the padawans, I'll be the first person to confront you." He yelled at the crowd in warning.

The commotion died down and eventually the crowd dissipated. All the children were safe in their new rooms. Only Armitage, Ben, and a few others were left. Armitage made his way over to Ben.

"That's The first time in about a month that you've threatened anyone," Armitage remarked.

"Yeah. I don't like it, but I refuse to let anyone pick on those kids. That last group needs more kindness than anyone else. I'm going to make sure they get it."

"Well at least your heart is in the right place. You have so much empathy and a natural talent for dealing with children. I think you'll make a fine teacher."

"You really think so?"

"Yes, I do."

Ben seems to contemplate for a moment. "Speaking of which, are you sure you wouldn’t want to be taught? What you did during the interrogation shows potential."

"I don't know.” Armitage looked off, choosing his next words. “It might be useful to have the skills, but I don't want to commit to a discipline I'm not sure is for me."

"That's alright," Ben reassured. "I don't have to train you to be a jedi. You don't even have to learn how to use a lightsaber. Just let me teach you how to use to force."

He turned the idea around in his mind before finally giving in,"You know what? Fine. I'll do it. But don't go thinking that I'll suddenly be jedi material."

"Oh, don't worry. Id never pin my hopes too high on you," Ben teased.

"You're insufferable."

"Thanks, I'm flattered."

"So when should I expect my first lesson?"

"Training for the padawans starts tomorrow. As soon as they break for lunch, we can meet. Let's say… eleven?"

"Sounds good. I'll see you then." Armitage left to tend to his own business. In hindsight, it almost sounded like they had scheduled a date. _In my dreams, maybe._ Armitage huffed and walked faster. 

***

Surprisingly, the anticipation of Armitage's lesson made him anxious all through the next morning. He nearly bumped into someone at breakfast while his mind was occupied. Ben was, of course, nowhere to be found in the dining hall, having gotten up early to train the padawans.

After his meal, Armitage wandered through the base aimlessly. For once, he didn't have a thousand tasks to complete. The lack of things to do left his mind to keep itself busy. Armitage had to reassure himself that the lessons wouldn't be a big deal. After all, he would just be spending several hours a week alone in an intimate setting with the man he liked. Oh yeah, and that man was also one of the most powerful and intimidating force users to date. Not to mention his long history of conflict with said man. _Yes, no big deal._

When eleven rolled around, Armitage made his way to a section of the clearing which had been cleaned if debris and set up as a makeshift training ground. He watched the end of the lesson quietly, careful not to disturb.

The younglings were all sitting on the ground, legs crossed and eyes closed. They were all wearing new sets of robes. After so long without jedi in the galaxy, it was odd to see. Rey and Ben circled around the children, encouraging them and keeping their focus.

Armitage noticed the small rocks surrounding each of the padawans. They were all attempting to lift them it seemed. Eventually one of them succeeded. Armitage saw a single pebble float in front of who he remembered to be Taren. The small boy's face was scrunched in concentration. Rey and Ben stopped to watch the boy complete the small feat. Only a few seconds later, the pebble wobbled in midair and then dropped back down.

"Okay everyone, you can stop," Rey announced. All of the kids opened their eyes and sighed in frustration. Armitage noticed that Sy seemed more upset than the rest.

"That's all for this morning," Ben told the students. "Do not be discouraged. Only one of you was able to lift a rock today. The important thing is not how long it takes you, but that you do it on your own time. For some of you, you will succeed tomorrow. For others it may take a week. But you will get there."

"You may leave for lunch," Rey said. "Meet back here at one. Follow the oldest padawans and keep close." With that said, the children got up and left for the dining hall. Rey left as well to rest before the next lesson.

Armitage cleared his throat as he approached Ben. Ben noticed his presence and smiled in greeting. "So you didn't change your mind," he remarked.

"For better or worse, no."

"Well then, take a seat. If you don't mind, I'm going to start you out with the same exercises I did with the padawans."

"I won't object." Armitage picked a clear spot on the ground and sat down cross legged.

"Okay, so in order to use the force, you need to be aware of it. You need to be able to feel it, to harness it.To make something levitate, a rock in this case, you need to know how the force works and how to use it. So I want you to simply reach out to the force. Sense it all around you."

Armitage closed his eyes and tried to concentrate. The fact that Ben was circling him wasn't helping. Nevertheless, he concentrated and reached out as he had during the attack and in the prison. It took a moment, but then he felt it. It hummed at his fingertips and brushed against mind. Armitage held onto the sensation and let the feeling wash over him.

"I feel the force," he told Ben.

"Good." Ben stopped in front of Armitage. "Now, tell me what you feel."

"It's not super strong," Armitage noted. "Just a light tingling sensation."

"That's expected. As you get more confident with the force, it’ll become more prominent."

"That makes sense."

"Would you like to see what the force really feels like at its full potential?"

"Why not?" Armitage tried to play down his curiosity.

His curiosity turned into nerves when Ben sat face to face with Armitage and held his hands. He didn't expect it and before he knew it Armitage was blushing hard. He didn't dare open his eyes, not wanting to know if Ben was watching. 

"I'm going to call out to the force with all my strength. As long as we keep contact, you'll be able to feel what I'm feeling."

Ben took a deep breath and lightly squeezed Armitage palms. Armitage was screaming inside. What was he supposed to do? Could he be any less awkward right now? Stupid feelings, stupid love-

And that's when it hit him. Armitage could suddenly feel the force without hindrance. It was truly overwhelming. The small hum of energy he felt was now full waves of out of body sensations washing over him. He could feel it in his gut and soul. His spine tingled and his eardrums rang. He could feel the planet, the heartbeats of its inhabitants, the heat of its molten core. Armitage senses couldn't interpret everything being thrown at them. It almost felt like his brain was going numb. 

Promptly, the connection went away completely. The sudden peace and silence was a shock to his system. And of course, he remembered that he was still holding Ben's hands. He took the risk and opened his eyes.

Ben's face was extremely close to his, having leaned closer in concentration. Armitage's breath hitched when they made eye contact. Ben slowly straightened his posture.

"That is the force in its rawest, purest form. No one ever taps into it like that for use. It's too much to control. You should never seek to harness the force at that level. It can cause more harm than good. That is the way of the dark side, always taking more and more because you can. The jedi, people of the light, only use what they need. The force is a means of protection and guidance, not a weapon to wield for intimidation. Does that make sense?"

"Yes, it does." Armitage didn't speak more than he has to, fearing that his words would betray him. He found it hard to take his eyes off of Ben. He was also acutely aware of the fact that neither of them had let go of each other. 

"Now, I want you to try to lift a rock. Don't control the force, but guide it and let it guide you. Work with it, not against it." Ben finally let go of Armitage's hands and backed up a bit, still sitting facing him.

Armitage shook off his fixation and focused on his task. Once he felt the force at his fingertips, he closed his eyes and pictured the rocks around him. After a moment, he felt them where they lay through the force. Keeping them in mind, he pictured the force lifting them into the air. He replayed the action in his head, willing it to happen. Then, he felt something happen. He could feel the rocks rise off of the ground. 

Surprised by his success, Armitage opened his eyes and looked around. Not one, but several rocks hovered around him, slowly rotating around his head. 

Ben looked equally surprised. "That's… impressive." he looked at Armitage, a small smile steadily growing larger. "Armitage! Look at what you're doing! Do you realize how hard it is to do that on the first try?"

"I have no idea how I'm doing it," Armitage said, trying to keep the rocks afloat.

"Probably because you're brilliant!" Ben inched closer again. "You're such a quick learner, I should have known!" In Ben's excitement, he leaned in closer to Armitage again. Once Ben realized this, he paused his praise.

Armitage could suddenly feel his heart pounding in his chest, it was beating so hard. They both sat there, inches apart, silent. Ben was the first to break the silence.

"You're amazing, you know that, right?" Ben murmured. "You try to scare people away, but you're so much more than what you portray yourself as. You're smart, and brave, and kinder than you'd let yourself believe."

Armitage couldn't find words. "And not only that," Ben continued, "But apparently gifted with the force."

Ben's compliments faded as tension grew. Armitage wanted nothing more than to just lean in a little more, to give in to how he felt, but something in him stopped himself from doing so, and that frustrated him. 

Evidently, he didn't have to make the first move. Ben leaned in, their lips getting closer and closer. The rocks promptly dropped to the ground around them, but Armitage didn't care. He began to close his eyes as they grew closer, closer…

And then he heard footsteps approaching. Armitage quickly backed up and got off the ground. Ben did the same.

"Hux, sir?" The messenger addressed Armitage. "You're needed by the generals. There's something they need you to look at."

Armitage willed the heat in his cheeks to dissipate. "Very well. I'll be right there."

Armitage followed shortly after the messenger. He didn't look back at Ben, not wanting to face what might or might have not happened had they not been interrupted. 

It was official. Ben was ruining his life and Armitage didn't want him to stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ha, suffer.


	20. Chapter 20

Armitage made his way to the base’s comms room as quickly as he could, as per the messenger's directions. The room was abuzz with technicians running back and forth between monitors and equipment. In front of the largest screen sat the generals, who were watching what seemed to be a live feed. Blaster fire and the cries of wookies could be heard in the footage.

Armitage walked up behind their chairs, diverting the pairs attention. They swiveled their seats around.

"Good, you're here," Finn said with relief. The stress he felt was evident in his every mannerism and micro expression.

Poe was no better off. "I'm sorry to call you away from your business, but we didn't have much choice. There's another attack happening right now on Kashyyyk. We need your help."

The news of the loyalists second strike sent a chill down Armitage's spine. Death was certain wherever they went. "What do you need of me?"

Finn gestured to the footage they were watching. "Some of the locals are streaming the footage on the holonet in hopes of getting someone's attention. One of our technicians just happened to see one and bring it to our attention. If you can, we need you to help us figure out their numbers and formulate a plan to keep them from causing more destruction. They were trained under techniques you helped devise; we figured you would know how they fight better than anyone."

Armitage immediately began assessing the situation. "What's our status right now?"

"We are trying to contact the local chieftain right now," Poe answered. "And we can't afford to send much support, but a small battalion of our soldiers are on their way to help."

"That is a sufficient start. Do we have any other videos of the attack? Different angles or locations I could analyze?"

"Yes, and we're finding more as we speak." Poe pointed to the monitors surrounding the main one. "By all means, please take a look at what we've found."

Armitage wasted no time and set a quick pace as he walked amongst the rows of screens. He took care to look for details in each one. As he examined the streams and clips, he began piecing together a metal map of the area's layout. Every so often, he'd stop at a station and ask the technician controlling it to rewind or pause the video, look at it for a moment, and then move on. The more he saw, the more he learned. It had been a while since he had felt the rush of assessing combat, but he felt right at home as he began to understand the scope and patterns of the battle.

At last he stopped once again in front of the main screen. Armitage had almost pieced together everything, but something was still missing. He watched the monitor carefully, waiting to find what he was looking for. Then, he found it.

"Rewind a bit," he told the generals.

They did so without question, Armitage's focused expression telling them that he was onto something. Armitage waited until he saw it again. It flashed on the screen again. 

"Pause it"

The video paused. Armitage pointed to a spot on the screen. "This is the key. At first I failed to understand why the wookies were taking such heavy losses. Their weaponry is not as advanced, but they are far stronger and tougher than humans, which is what the majority of the First Order was always comprised of. I knew there must be something hindering their ability to fight back. And there it is."

The generals looked closer at the blurry image Armitage was showing them. Sure enough, amongst the terrorists rushing into combat was a clustered group who stood still, as if guarding something. On closer inspection, a large metal box with an audio emitter was in the center of the group.

"That is a device used to give enemies a splitting headache that is certain to reduce cognition and coordination. The First Order used such technology for interrogations and torture. It can be tuned to any specific species in order to transmit a frequency high enough to hinder the targets. In this case, the correct frequency for a wookie is much higher than what a human is even capable of hearing. So it affects only the wookies, while the loyalists remain unharmed. If we want to have a chance, that device must be destroyed."

The generals looked at him with wide eyes, trying to comprehend what they were told. 

"How do you know so much about that thing, and how can you tell what it is?" Finn asked.

"I invented it," Armitage simply stated.

Poe spoke up. "Okay. So if that's the case, how do you suggest we get rid of it? It's got a shelf of troupers protecting it."

"I believe there to be approximately two hundred hostiles in the area. Thirty of them are positioned around the device. The rest are facing the wookies head on. If we attack them directly, our forces will be shot down effortlessly. The device is at the back, with their troops in front. I suggest we have our allies sneak around to the back of the village using the side paths I noticed in the other streams. While we send some soldiers to distract the main offense, the rest will sneak up behind the guards using the cover of the dense foliage and take them down. Then we can stop the frequency from being transmitted."

"Sounds like a plan, I'll take your word for it," Poe said looking at Armitage then Finn. 

"Generals, we've reached the chieftain," a woman informs them.

"Good work Laira," Finn told the technician. "Armitage, Laira can translate your plan to the chieftain. Just relay your instructions to her and she'll make sure it happens."

Armitage explained everything to the woman, and she told the chieftain in turn. When he had finished, Armitage waited for a response. The voice of the wookie came through the comms.

"He is willing to do as you say," Laira told Armitage. "Our battalion had just arrived. The chieftain is going to rally everyone and execute the plan."

Armitage tried his best to relax as he took a seat next to the generals. All he could do now was watch things unfold. This was his least favorite part of being in command, holding his breath and praying that his orders would be enough.

The three of them watched as the carnage continued. Eventually their forces arrived. A small group faced the loyalists. They did not aim to kill, but instead taunted and evaded with the intent of keeping their attention. It worked for a while, but then the enemy began to figure them out. He saw Finn wince out of the corner of his eye when one of their own was shot down. 

Just as Armitage began to doubt himself, an explosion could be heard offscreen. Whoever was recording the live feed turned to face the commotion. The device had been destroyed. Everyone in the comms room cheered. The rest of the battle unfolded as Armitage hoped it would. The wookies, who had been doubled over in pain from the frequency, regained their senses and took the chance that had been given to them. Between the locals and the resistance battalion, the terrorists were quickly surrounded. Their enemies began to raise their arms in surrender. The whole room was on the edge of their seats. Had they won?

As their allies began to approach the group, someone emerged. There no doubt in Armitage's mind that it was Xander Imwe, one of the loyalist leaders and Captain Vora's lover. He advanced towards the wookie warriors without hesitation. Armitage tried to listen in as he began to speak, but the audio kept cutting out. He could only tell that Imwe was making a threat. 

When Imwe finished speaking, everyone around him stepped back in alarm. He threw something to the ground, and the entire screen went white.

"What the hell was that?" Finn asked.

"It was a flash grenade, sir," one of the technicians answered. "We've lost all visuals, but are still in contact with the battalion. It seems that whoever that was has disappeared."

"He just left his soldiers behind?" Poe wondered aloud with bewilderment.

"Yes sir. The terrorists are still surrounded and are currently being detained, but that man is gone."

"Make sure that no one else gets away." Poe turned his chair to face Armitage. "Their leader may have gotten away, but in any case you just saved so many innocent people. What you did was amazing! I've never seen anyone analyze a battle and handle it so well. You've done a great service for the galaxy."

"I'm sure glad you're on our side now," Finn told Armitage. "We're going to need people like you in order to win this in the long run."

Admittedly, this was more recognition than Armitage had ever received for his past achievements. The praise was foreign to him, and the gravity of it truly touched him. But of course, he couldn't let Finn and Poe know that.

"I am grateful that I was able to help," he told them. "I appreciate your compliments, although I hope I am truly deserving."

"Nonsense," Finn said. "You went above and beyond. Because of you, Kashyyyk is safe."

"Speaking of which, why do you think they attacked Kashyyk?" Poe asked. 

"Kashyyyk is known for its abundant natural resources. There's a myriad of things they could want from the planet and its inhabitants. Most likely natural fuel and alloy for weaponry."

"Makes sense," Poe agreed. "Well, I think we have everything covered for now. Please, take some time to do whatever you wish, no obligations or duties for the rest of the day. You've more than earned it."

Armitage thanked them and left. He didn't know how to feel. He was full of pride because of his success, but also disappointment because their own men hadn't come out unscathed. He also felt the pressure of high expectations, which he worried he wouldn't be able to live up to. And then there was the awkward position he was left in with Ben. How would he approach him the next time they spoke? Would Ben refuse to look him in the eyes? Had he read the situation wrong?

This prompted Armitage to check the time. He found the nearest clock. It was one thirty. Ben would be back to teaching by now. Armitage shook his head and tried to clear his thoughts. He would deal with things later. Right now, all he needed was a shady spot to rest and a strong drink.

_ Maybe several, to deal with all of the shit I'm going through.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I just wanted to talk about Hux for a second. Every piece of media with him in it suggests that he is one of the brightest minds in the galaxy of his time. It is canon that he created most of the weaponry and vehicles/ships the First Order used, and he also designed Star Killer base. I always felt that the films watered down his intelligence in favor of comedic moments, so as always I aim to give him and other characters what they deserve. In this chapter, I wanted to reflect just how smart and capable he is when given the chance.


	21. Chapter 21

That night, Armitage was very much distracted as he made his way through the serving line at dinner. He almost dropped his plate at one point, and he caught himself accidentally staring at a random person as he waited for his turn at the drinks station. Even as he approached his usual table, he nearly tripped over BB-8 as the droid zipped by.

Armitage noticed a table on the other side of the room which was occupied by the padawans. Most of them ate happily, goofing off with each other and starting food fights. Little Taren was giggling as he talked to the younger kids. Sy, Eizere, and Aunis all sat on one end of the table and kept to themselves.

To Armitage's relief, Ben was not at the table they shared with the others. He was still anxious about facing him again, and planned on putting off the interaction for as long as he could. Armitage took an empty seat. At the moment, the only other people at the table were Rose and Jannah. They were engrossed in their own conversation, so Armitage kept to himself and quietly began to eat. Besides his current nervousness, he had to admit that he was beginning to feel comfortable sharing meals with the others. As hesitant as he was to say it, Armitage was starting to consider them friends. 

Someone called his name, and he snapped his head up from his plate. 

"Sorry, yes?" Armitage acknowledged, realizing Rose was trying to get his attention.

"Okay, so are you ever going to admit that you are absolutely in love with Ben, or do you plan on denying it for eternity?" Rose asked out of nowhere.

Armitage was caught like a fathier in the headlights of a speeder. He struggled not to choke on his food as he tried to keep his cool. "I have no idea what you're talking about," he tried to refute.

"Oh come on, it's clear there is something between you two!"

"I think so too," Jannah said. "Every time I see you and Ben together you look at him like he holds the galaxy in his eyes."

Had he really been that obvious? Armitage cringed at the thought of him looking like a sappy dope in front of Ben and everyone else. There was no way Ben hadn't noticed. 

Well, there was no point in trying to convince Jannaha and Rose of anything otherwise. "Even if that is true, it's not as if Ben feels the same away."

"Are you kidding me?" Rose exclaimed incredulously. "Ben fell just as hard as you did, if not moreso."

"I happened to see him on the training grounds after you had to report to the generals earlier," Jannah added. "I don't know what happened before you left, but he was blushing like crazy and clearly flustered."

Armitage didn't know how to process what he was being told. Was it really possible that Ben felt the same way? He couldn't fathom why, as he never saw anything loveable in himself. But then again, what if what they were saying wasn't true? What if Jannah had misunderstood the situation? What if they were trying to get him to make a fool of himself for their own amusement? It wouldn't be the first time someone had tried to ruin things for him through blackmail or humiliation. As much as Armitage wanted it to be true, he was wary to think that a mutual attraction might be possible. He didn't know if he could bear the rejection if things didn't go his way.

And of course, that's when Armitage noticed Ben and the rest of the group heading towards the table. He prayed that Ben hadn't seen him yet.

"You know what? I think I'll just finish my meal somewhere else. It might be nice to get some fresh air," Armitage quickly told the women. He picked up his plate and left the dining hall with barely a "goodbye". He didn't know where he was going, but he didn't want to be stuck in such an awkward situation. 

When he made it outside, Armitage decided to walk up to the top of the hill the base was built into, ending up standing on top of the base's entrance. He sat on the edge with his legs dangling over the doorway and finished eating. He appreciated the tranquility and soft moonlight of the evening. It helped to ease his mind. 

When he finished, Armitage set his dishes to the side and simply breathed in the cool night air, trying to calm himself. It had nearly worked when someone climbed the hill to join him. 

It took Armitage a moment to identify the figure in the shadows of the trees, but as it got closer he knew it was Ben. He immediately turned his head to avoid making eye contact. Even when Ben sat down next to him, he didn't look at him.

"It's a beautiful night," Ben said in an effort to start a conversation.

Armitage simply hummed in agreement.

"Why weren't you at dinner?"

"I was, actually. I left before you arrived."

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine. I just felt like eating alone."

"Oh."

The following silence was uncomfortable. It seemed both of them had the same thing on their mind, but refused to say it first.

"I heard about what you did for Kashyyyk," Ben spoke again. "What you did was impressive. Thank you for helping."

"It was my duty. But I must admit that I am glad I was successful. Finn and Poe kept thanking me."

"See? You keep telling me that you don't mean anything to the resistance, but you care about them and they care about you."

"I could say the same of you. You try to downplay everything you've done, but the galaxy has you to thank more than me."

"How so?"

"Well for one, you defeated the bloody Emperor. And you went from trying to oppress the galaxy to saving it. You have been invaluable around here ever since then. And not to mention the fact that you are taking on the massive responsibility of reviving the ways of the jedi through the next generation."

"I guess you're right."

"And you know what? After witnessing all you have done, I have come to realize the error in my judgement of you. I used to believe you to be nothing more than a spoiled, demanding bully who used his gifts to get what he wanted. All I ever saw of you was your outbursts and disregard for rules. But now I see that there is so much more to you. I filled my heart with hatred for you for so long. But now I've let it go."

Ben was stunned for a moment. "Do you really mean that?"

"Yes. And I sincerely hope you can forgive me for how I acted at first. I have certainly forgiven you. For everything."

"Of course I forgive you. We might not always get along, but I know you're a good person at heart. It just took some time for both of us to realize that."

Armitage nodded and remained silent, unsure of what to say.

He didn't have to think about it for long. "I just remembered what I came up here for in the first place," Ben mentioned. "We need to talk."

Armitage's nerves came back in anticipation of what he knew Ben was getting at. "About?"

"About what happened earlier. What happened between us."

Armitage knew this would come up eventually. He just wished it wasn't so soon. "What about it?" He asked cautiously.

"I just want to know if I did something wrong. You left without saying anything or even acknowledging me. Were you uncomfortable? Did I go too far?"

"No, you did nothing wrong. It was all me."

"What do you mean?"

Armitage didn't answer immediately, everything he wanted to say on the tip of his tongue but refusing to come out. 

"Armitage?" Ben inquired softly. He gently put his hand over Armitage's. Armitage finally turned and met Ben's gaze. Before he could stop himself, everything came tumbling out.

"I have feelings for you, you big idiot! I don't know why or how but ever since that first day in the medical bay I've slowly realized that I care for you. You're so gentle with me and you never once judged me for my past or how I treated you. You made me feel accepted and wanted for the first time in my life and have done more than you know for me. You're so talented and amazing and every time I watch you do something incredible it never ceases to amaze me. I can't be around you without getting flustered and feeling affection towards you. When I am in your arms I feel safe and happy. I pride myself on always being so put together but you make me feel like a fool. And I find you so annoyingly handsome that every time I look at you I feel lovestruck. I've never felt this way about anyone before and the thought of it is terrifying but freeing and I don't know how to-"

Armitage's rapid, rambling confession is cut off by Ben suddenly cradling his face and pulling him close. Ben's lips crash into his own and he forgets what he was saying. Armitage is stuck in a state of shock, but then eagerly kisses Ben back. Everything is so warm and desperate and Armitage feels as if he might die right then and there. He grips onto Ben's arms and melts in his embrace. Both of them seemingly never want the kiss to end, but they eventually end up pulling away to catch their breath.

All they can do is look at each other and try to process what happened. Armitage's mouth is slightly agape and his brain refuses to function. "I- you… Ben? What?"

Ben is grinning from ear to ear and has such an affectionate look on his face that for a moment Armitage thinks he's dreaming. "I like you too, Armitage. I have for a while, actually. But I always told myself that you would never love me back. I tried to ignore it. After our first week on base, I realized that I never stopped having feelings for you. There were some times when I suspected you might feel the same way, but I didn't push it. On the training grounds, I was just so proud of you and you looked so perfect that I acted without thinking. But when you didn't pull away, I realized that it was mutual."

"This entire time, we both felt the same way but decided to just suffer instead of saying anything?"

"I guess so, sounds about right."

Armitage was beaming. For once, be felt truly happy. He still didn't know how things would work out or what the future would hold, but right here and now, he had everything he wanted.

"We really are both just massive idiots, aren't we?" Armitage asked in exasperation. 

"Yes. But don't worry, we'll just have to make up for lost time." Ben smirked and leaned in again. Armitage reciprocated without hesitation and they kissed once more. Armitage felt like he was finally complete.

***

Sometime later, the two of them headed back to their rooms. They walked close together and spoke quietly, careful not to wake anyone. When they made it to their doors, they turned to face each other.

"You know, I have never done this before. The whole relationship thing, I mean. If that's what this is?" Armitage confessed. 

"Its okay. I haven't either. And I'd like it to be, if you want. We can just take things one step at a time."

"I'd… like that. Very much."

Ben smiled. "Okay then. Goodnight, Armitage. " he began walking to his own door.

"Goodnight," Armitage replied. He then pulled Ben back and gave him a peck on the cheek. It felt so right. "Oh, and Ben? Thank you."

"For what?" Ben questioned curiously. 

"For loving me even though I find it hard to love myself."

Armitage went into his room without another word. His door shut and he heard Ben's do the same. Armitage threw himself onto his city and stared at the ceiling. _Ben loves me,_ he thought. He never would have believed it. Ben loved him, as broken and conflicted as he was. And that was enough.

Armitage replayed the night's events over and over in his head until exhaustion finally took hold of him.

When he drifted into sleep, he didn't have any nightmares. He was at peace.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! Thank you all for your patience. For now, I plan on reducing my update frequency until I'm not so busy. No guarantees on how often I'll add new chapters, but I'll do my best. Thanks for understanding!

When Armitage woke up, he was in a better mood than he had been in months. He left his room to start the day, and was surprised to find Ben standing in the hallway. The awkward man was trying very hard not to look like he was waiting for Armitage to awake. It made a small smile grace his face.  _ What a dork. _

__ They greeted each other and walked side by side to the dining hall, conversing about this and that with ease. Now that the tension was gone, everything seemed so much simpler.

When they got in line for food, Armitage tried to go about his business like usual, attempting to hide any signs of how giddy he felt knowing that he was no longer alone. It was difficult, especially when Ben's arm would brush his as they picked their food or when he would lean in to make snarky comments. They made it through the line and took seats next to each other at their usual table. 

Armitage admired the multicolored lanterns on the ceiling as he ate. While he was occupied, Ben reached under the table and held Armitage's hand. It made him jolt, but he begrudgingly accepted it. He didn't fancy the idea of people being able to see them, but if it made Ben smile and blush the way he was now, he'd gladly hold his hand forever.

Of course, that's when Finn and Poe sat down across from them. Armitage didn't think they could see anything, but he still tensed. Ben must have been able to sense his discomfort, so he slowly let go of Armitage's hand so no one would notice. Ben winked at him teasingly, and Armitage almost choked on his food. He immediately looked at the generals, expecting a reaction, but they were too busy being boyfriends to pay attention.

Normally he would have rolled his eyes at them, but all considering he felt he really couldn't be one to talk.

Ben seemed to think they were in the clear, because he gave Armitage a peck on the cheek. Armitage sputtered and gently shoved him away.

"You're helpless, aren't you? You do realize we are in a room full of people who don't know about us I assume?" He chastised Ben in a hushed tone.

"Can you blame me? It's hard not to be clingy when it's you I'm sitting next to."

Armitage didn't know what to say, much to his annoyance. He just glared at Ben, eyebrows knit in frustration and ears burning. Ben just looked smug. He really was Han's son. 

"Wait a minute," said Poe, who was now very much paying attention. He raised his brows and then began to laugh. Finn realized what was going on and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Finn, you owe me fifty credits!" Poe announced triumphantly, holding out his hand to receive his prize. Finn begrudgingly dug into his pockets and forked over the bet money. Ben and Armitage watched from across the table with started confusion.

"Wait… you knew about us before we did?" Ben asked, dumbfounded by the situation.

"Yeah, it’s pretty damn obvious," Finn said incredulously. "Poe was nearly pulling his hair out waiting for something to happen."

"And you bet on us?" Armitage questioned. 

Poe explained. "Well, Finn thought that neither of you would give up your dignity to admit it. I, however, bet that eventually one of you would give in."

"Yes, and we're all very amused by your romantic optimism," Finn shook his head. Ben laughed a little at the development. Armitage couldn't say he shared the same humor.

Armitage sighed with annoyance. "Is there anyone on this bloody planet that doesn't know about us?"

"Doubtful," Finn answered blatantly. "As it is, Rose and Jannah might have an aneurism when they find out."

"Well, at least we don't have the burden of revealing the truth to everyone, " Ben remarked, seemingly unfazed by any of this. If anything, he thought it was funny. As much as this annoyed Armitage, he didn't have the heart to be mad.  _ This stupid wonderful idiot. _

Armitage managed to survive the rest of his meal despite the playful jeers from the generals. Ben excused himself to meet with his padawans, and Armitage was left alone. He didn't realize how much he valued Ben's company until he was gone. 

Right as he was about to excuse himself, Poe cleared his throat. "All jokes aside, we wanted to discuss something with you. In private, if that's okay?"

Armitage was curious. He didn't have a clue as to what this could be about. "By all means. Whatever you need."

He followed the pair outside. They strolled around the perimeter of the clearing, away from the people going about their day in the base. 

"So, what's this all about?" Armitage asked.

"Poe and I have decided to go on a secret mission to Hutta," Finn explained. "Completely confidential. Only you and a few others are to know about it."

"We can't afford to let the loyalists continue on for much longer. If they go through with whatever they're planning next, it could mean the end of everything we've worked for. Finn and I need to find them and figure out how to stop them."

"But why you two? You are our leaders and morale support. People will notice your absence. And if something happened to you, where would we be? You could just as easily send some covert spies to accomplish the same thing."

"Yeah, I see where you're coming from," Finn said. "That seems to be the obvious choice. Which is exactly why we're doing this instead. No one will suspect us of all people. Plus, many of our best spies are already spread thin or dead. Trust me, I'd call Vi Moradi if I could, but she has her hands full on Batuu still."

"I trust you know what you're doing," Armitage conceded. "But who will run things here while you are away?"

"That's why we wanted to talk to you," Poe answered. "We've decided that we want to make you an honorary general of the resistance. You'll take care of things while we're away, and you'll get updates from us as we figure things out."

Armitage was shocked to say the least. "I- why me? Do you really trust me of all people with this responsibility? Despite what I've done and who I was?"

"Please, you've proven yourself more than worthy. You have the knowledge and tactical know-how. Plus, you've done nothing but help us this whole time. We trust you to do the right thing."

Armitage took a shaky breath, trying to steel himself. They were right, after all.  _ Weren't they?  _ "If you really think so, then I accept the offer. I will try my best not to let you down."

Finn put his hand on Armitage's shoulder reassuringly. "We know you won't. We leave first thing tomorrow. As far as everyone else knows, we're just going to the nearest system on a diplomatic mission. That's all they need to think. Got it?"

"Yes," Armitage replied. He couldn't deny that the prospect of being in a position of command once more was thrilling, but he also felt the weight of responsibility that came with it. He couldn't mess this up. Armitage just hoped that the rest of the crew would be as thrilled about his promotion as Finn and Poe were.

When all was said and done, Armitage left to attend his own business. The time seemed to crawl as he waited for his next lesson to roll around. When it was finally lunch time for the younglings, Armitage made short work of the walk over to the training grounds. There he found Ben, beaming at him as he approached.

"I was told about your new title,  _ general _ ," Ben remarked, mocking a salute. "And don't worry, I know the mission details. Rey does too."

"Well, it's a relief to know I won't have to keep my mouth shut around  _ everybody _ ."

"I'm sure, shutting up doesn't seem to be included in your list of talents."

"It's nice to see you too, you big oaf."

Ben feigned shock. "And here I thought you liked me."

"That's constantly up for debate."

The tension Armitage didn't know he had lessened as he settled onto the grass with Ben, allowing himself to bask in the sun and feel the breeze in his face. He wished every moment could be like this, no danger in sight and in the company of those he cared about. It would almost be enough to make up for the hell he had endured for the greater part of his life.

"Now, you are obviously capable of lifting small rocks,"said Ben. "But is that  _ all _ you can do?"

"Is that a challenge?"

"Maybe."

"Then let's find out."


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm finally back! Life has been crazy because of everything going on in the world right now, and as a senior in my last few weeks of school, it's been particularly rough. But now I have more time than ever to write, and I plan on trying to upload more frequently. Thanks for reading!

It was just before the verge of dawn the next morning when Armitage stood in the cold, damp launch bay. He looked on as some last minute supplies were loaded onto an unsuspecting freighter ship. He spoke with some of the cargo crew, double and triple checking to ensure that the generals would have all they needed for the days to come. 

As soon as the freighter was ready for takeoff, Finn and Poe promptly entered the hangar. They approached Armitage with smiles and shook his hand.

"Good morning, general," Poe said with an air of humor. They were all, in fact, generals now, which seemed slightly absurd.

"It will be better once I know you are on Hutta safely, general," Armitage replied, letting the stupid joke distract him from his slowly mounting anxiety. This was a lot on all three of their reputable shoulders.

"Come on general, we need to get moving," Poe called out to Finn, trying to hide his obvious amusement. He spoke again, this time addressing Armitage. "Thank you for the help general, I know we can count on you." 

Armitage heard Finn laughing as he walked up the ship ramp and disappeared into the hull.

"It is my honor, general," Armitage said, hardly containing a small smile.

Poe shook his head and chuckled. "But really, thank you. We have absolute faith in you." Poe ran up the ramp as the freighter's engines ignited, heating up the hangar. The ramp began to contract and rise. 

"Good luck general!" Finn yelled right as the door shut. Armitage could hear both men losing it right before the ship was sealed. It made him laugh a little to himself.  _ Idiots,  _ he thought. 

The engines roared as the freighter lifted off the concrete floor. Armitage ran and followed it as it flew out of the launch bay. When he made it outside, he was met with the beauty of the sunrise. The sky was painted with brilliant hues of violet, blazing orange, and rosy pink. The clouds were backlit with the goldenrod light slowly rising over the dense trees. Armitage watched Finn and Poe's ship rise into the masterpiece of a sky until they were but a speck in the humid atmosphere. 

Armitage simply stood there for a moment, drinking in the early morning and breathing deeply to calm his nerves. Poe and Finn trusted him, but would everyone else?

***

Once the sun was high in the sky, he decided it was time to find out. Armitage made his way to the control center where he had led the battle on Kashyyyk. After a minute or two of hesitation, he steeled himself and entered. 

The door closed behind him and he cleared his throat to get the room's attention. Everyone turned to find the noise, and when they realised who it was they went silent.

Armitage found himself subconsciously straightening his posture as he felt the weight of a hundred eyes on him. "Good day, everyone. I am under the impression that you all know about my appointment as general. Is this correct?"

The onlookers were silent for a pause, as if they were unsure whether to speak in his presence. Then, a young woman stepped forward. Lieutenant Connix, if Armitage remembered correctly. Poe had said she was a great soldier, and was particularly close to General Organa. Connix had light blonde hair, but besides that he might have mistaken her for Organa's daughter if he didn't know better.

"You are correct, sir. Poe and Fi- I mean, the other generals notified us of the development." Armitage could already feel the tension in the room as it was, and the nervous response didn't help. 

Still, he took a deep breath and carried on. "Very good. Now, as you've all likely  _ also _ been told, the generals will be gone for some time. They are on a confidential mission, and the details of which will be discussed on a need-to-know basis only. I hope you will trust that we are doing the right thing, in the name of the galaxy and it's freedom."

Armitage hoped for some sort of reaction, but was only met with more wary glances. He could have used the force to lightly rifle through their hesitations, but he figured he didn't want to know. As it was, the discouragement he felt now was the complete opposite of the confidence he had when he commanded a destroyer full of people who feared his every move. That same fear now seemed completely wrong to him. He wanted their mutual respect, and didn't have a clue as to how to earn it.

Eventually Lieutenant Connix spoke again. "We appreciate your dedication in such a time, General… Hux…" She trailed off, but quickly picked back up. "We are prepared to serve the resistance however we can."

Armitage thought about the way she said his name, as if it were a lump of poison she hesitated to swallow but couldn't find the courage to spit out. The words almost seemed bitter for her to say. He wondered how it felt, having the name of a hated enemy become the same as that of an ally and superior. Armitage supposed it must feel strange. But then, so was this entire situation.

"I appreciate your kind words, Lieutenant," he spoke directly to her. He hoped she understood the silent "thank you" he was trying to convey. Armitage then looked back to the crowd. "You may all return to your positions. I will let you know if anything specific is required of you." Some people on the edges of the throng began to shuffle away. "Oh, and one more thing-" They stopped in their tracks. "Formalities aren't needed. Please, just call me Armitage." He said this with a valiant attempt at a reassuring smile.

Apparently it partially worked, because some people dropped their tense shoulders while others let go of breaths they didn't know they were holding in. Quietly, the room went back to business as usual. Armitage quickly approached Connix as she headed for her station. When he lightly tapped her shoulder, she whipped around.

"Oh dear! My apologies, Hu- ah, Armitage. You startled me." Connix smiled at him. Whether this was out of polite pity or genuine friendliness, Armitage didn't know.

Armitage waved his hand in dismissal. "No worries, I seem to have that effect on everyone." He sighed, feeling the awkwardness permeating the room. "But anyways, I wanted to thank you for speaking to me when no one else would. I want you to know that I really am trying my best, and I hope that the other operatives will eventually come to find me approachable. Your effort certainly helped me feel a little less unwelcome."

Connix's expression softened a bit, much to Armitage's relief. Maybe she was just genuinely being friendly after all. "Of course. I hope you know that we don't hate you or anything. We all recognize that you've already done so much to help the resistance, but you'll have to forgive us if we're wary. After all, you are still responsible for our past turmoil, our losses, and defeats. But I think with time, we'll learn to move past that, just as you have."

"I certainly hope so. Thank you, you are dismissed."

With that, Connix went back to her station, leaving Armitage once again in a sea of near strangers he was meant to lead. At the moment it felt like trying to put a great ocean on a leash and teach it tricks. He decided he had made everyone uncomfortable enough for the time being and left. Some hidden part of him almost wanted to laugh at what he had come to. How could a small group intimidate him so much?

The rest of Armitage told that part of him to fuck off as he headed for the sunny clearing. 


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy May 4th! I plan on celebrating all week with multiple updates, as well as bonus content on my tumblr (@galaxy-of-legends). I'll be posting some art, as well as something regarding future projects... one of which is going to be a direct sequel to this work! I plan on making this a series, featuring full length stories as well as one shots and extra content! So please check my tumblr for more info this week and check back here for updates as well!

"Alright, can you do it one more time to make sure you've got it?" Ben stopped his pacing to stand near Armitage, who stood in a focused stance amongst the tall emerald grass.

Armitage nodded and reached for the force once more. Just like the other three times he had done this, he used it to levitate the small boulder in front of him. It lifted off of the ground with a slight wobble. Once the rock was steady at Armitage's eye level, he made it revolve in a circle around him. After a few rotations, he tossed the boulder up into the air, letting gravity bring it back down with a dull thud as it hit the soil. Armitage then used the force to send the boulder flying away from him, making it land at the base of a tree several yards away. With a pulling motion of his hand, Armitage sent the rock back towards him. It ended up at his feet and he relaxed, thinking the test was over. 

"How was tha-" Armitage paused his question. He felt a slight tingling sensation on the back of his neck. Letting the force guide him, he whipped around and stopped a fruit that was hurtling towards him in midair. He looked to Ben, who was holding another one of the planet's native fruits in his hand. Armitage let the projectile drop to the ground.

"What was that for?" Armitage asked, half amused and half annoyed.

"I'm testing you, _obviously._ I can't properly do that if you know what's coming. But don't worry, you did well. I think I can safely say you've mastered the basics of object manipulation. And your response to the force's guidance wasn't _that_ bad."

"What do you mean, _that bad?_ I think I did just fine."

Ben put up his hands in surrender. "I'm kidding! For the most part you were okay. You just need to trust the force more. You hesitated a little."

"I know," Armitage said. "And I try, but I find it hard to put my faith in something so… fluid I suppose? When it comes to engineering and physics, everything is what it is. Everything can be measured and calculated, and those facts don't change. The force doesn't seem constant or precise at all."

Ben sat down near Armitage, and gestured for him to do the same. "That's completely dependent on you. Think of the force as a piece of machinery. You have to figure out what it's made of and how it operates. After that, it's only a matter of discovering its limitations and knowing how to use it. Of course, that is only a generalization. The force is mysterious, even to great masters. You need to have a mutual understanding with it, a back and forth dialogue. Like programming, I guess in this case. Some things will work, others won't. You must communicate with the force, and listen to what it says back. A full comprehension of the force and how to employ it comes with time. You'll get it."

Armitage sighed. "I suppose I see what you mean, I just wish it wasn't so convoluted. I hate not understanding things."

Ben clasped his hands with Armitage's. "Hey, you weren't born as an expert in astrophysics. This is just a new puzzle for you to work out." He pressed a kiss to Armitage's forehead. "And if it makes you feel any better, you're cute when you're annoyed."

Armitage turned his head to hide how flustered he was. "Piss off!"

"Case in point," Ben said with a smug grin. "Ah, I just remembered.Tomorrow Rey is going to look into buying some lightsaber parts for the kids. Would you mind helping me with lessons while she's gone?"

"I think I'm hardly qualified."

"You'll be fine. I'll do most of the teaching, you can just assist. Plus, I was hoping you'd talk to some of the padawans- three in particular. Do you remember Sy, Eizere, and Aunis, the last ones to arrive?"

"I believe so."

"Well, they've been having trouble. It's no secret that they've been through hell. They doubt themselves and don't seem to put much effort into their training. I was hoping that some encouragement from someone who's been in similar conditions would inspire them. You know, to see someone who's overcome their circumstances and started learning how to use their gifts."

"If it's important to you, I'll do it. But I don't have much experience with kids. I taught cadet classes briefly when I was younger, but that was hardly a nurturing environment."

"Don't worry about it, I have faith in you."

"Everyone keeps telling me that, but I have yet to convince myself."

***

As dusk enveloped the misty jungles of Ajan Kloss, Armitage walked with purpose down the dimly lit halls of the base. He had taken this very path multiple times, and by now could traverse the maze of corridors with ease. Once again, like most nights, he found himself at the prison cells.

The picture he saw inside the room was as it always was. In the very last cell, Vora'Eris'Ianew sat with her back against the wall and her head hung low. Her belongings still graced the small table in the room, which Armitage made a point to rifle through once in a while to make sure he hadn't missed anything. The space was eerily silent.

Armitage turned to the same nervous guard, who he now knew to be named Faron, and simply nodded. The two had shared enough conversations during the general's visits to no longer be strangers. Faron took the cue and left the room.

Instead of addressing the prisoner, Armitage remained in the doorway and focused on her thoughts. He had gotten quite good at it, quickly slipping in and out of someone's consciousness to read their minds. He had practiced the trick discretely during meal times on unsuspecting rebels. It was relatively harmless, and he never went snooping for information he shouldn't have. _Well, except for the time that one girl started reminiscing about her university days while eating toast._

The first thing Armitage always detected when using such force abilities on people was their emotions. Eris's always felt like a dark, rumbling storm, always threatening to spill over but never quite doing so. It was a constant, seething anger, one Armitage knew all too well. Sensing how Eris felt made him realize why as a boy he swore he always heard distant thunder when his father was around. _I wonder, did he have the force too?_

After the emotions of a person washed over him, their thoughts followed. Again, Eris's were always the same. Swirling ideas of violence, regret, revenge, and hatred filled her mind.

Upon finding that Eris was the same as usual, Armitage loosened his grip on her brain and approached her cell. He put on the calm, calculated facade he used whenever he talked to the ex-captain. 

"Captain Vora," he said in a deadpan manner, "Do you have anything more to say to me today?"

Eris lifted her head and glared at the man, her ruby eyes glowing softly in the fading light pouring through the room's small window. Her voice was a grumble, barely audible. "I have nothing to say to you."

Armitage walked up to the bars, hands clasped behind his back. He stood in parade rest in front of the prisoner. "A pity," he said nonchalantly. "It would be so much easier if you talked. Easier for you, I mean, not me."

"So far all your threats have been empty, _General Hux._ "

"Would you prefer that I fulfill them, Eris?" He made sure to put emphasis on the fact that he had addressed her by her first name.

Silence.

"I thought not. Why don't you just tell me where Xander Imwe and his band of thugs are, and what they are planning? I assure you, your cooperation would be rewarded. It will be much better than what I'd like to do, if it were allowed. You're lucky I don't have full jurisdiction over how prisoners are handled."

"Those _thugs_ used to be your men."

"Yes, well, they don't seem to be too fond of me now."

"It's not hard to see why. You treated them like expendable resources, never like sentient beings. You never showed an ounce of compassion. We were nothing to you. And when we're done, everything you love, everything you know, will become nothing."

"And how do you plan on accomplishing that within these concrete walls?"

"Ha! I don't plan on being in here for much longer."

Armitage scoffed. "Hilarious."

Without warning, Eris lunged forward and gripped onto the cell bars with such force that her knuckles turned white. Her face was now mere inches from Armitage's. "Stop acting so fucking smug! Do you have an ounce of remorse?"

Armitage paused before responding. "Yes, I do. There's not a day where what I've done doesn't plague me. But unlike your people, I've tried to make amends. All you do is continue to cause chaos and carnage."

"That's funny, you think you and I are any different? We couldn't be more alike. Do you know how many troopers died on Exegol? Over a billion! A billion people with thoughts and dreams and hope! And you stole that from them!"

"If I didn't, they would have taken over the galaxy!"

"No, Palpatine would have! We were just obeying orders! That's all we ever did, and all we earned was death! That's all my sister did!"

"What do you mean?"

"My sister was employed to the same destroyer as I was. _Your_ star destroyer! We failed a mission planetside. We did all we could, but it wasn't enough. My sister was the one to deliver the news to you. You shot her point blank without a word! I had to carry her fucking corpse off the bridge!"

A cold chill ran down Armitage's spine. He backed up, feeling sick. He couldn't even remember doing that, such occurrences weren't uncommon. How many people had he killed in cold blood for their shortcomings? How many innocent people who had been wretched from their families as children had he murdered on a whim? How could he do that? Had he never once pondered that fact that they had souls and feelings? Of course not, empathy was beaten out of him at a young age. Had he always been such a monster? Was he still one? Armitage began to hyperventilate.

"I'll bet Ren doesn't even know half of what you've done. Do you think he'll still love you when he finds out?"

"How do you-"

"I don't need the force to see your connection. After all, it was you who trained me to look for a person's weak spots." Eris laughed. "I can't wait until Xander brings Ren to the brink of death, just to tell him what you've done as he dies. I hope you get to see his look of disgust and betrayal as the light fades from his eyes!"

"Shut. Up."

"What would he say, I wonder? Do you think he'll see you the same way after I tell him about what happened on Planet 64?"

"I SAID SHUT UP!" Armitage extended his arms, crackling lightning shooting from his fingertips. Eris screamed in agony and collapsed to the floor as the electric charge coursed through her. Armitage had never felt so volatile, so powerful. It was as if he couldn't stop if he tried.

"Armitage, stop!" Ben yelled, running to the general's side and gripping his shoulders. "You're better than this!"

Armitage turned and was met with Ben's face contorted in fear and concern. _What was he doing?_

He stopped electrocuting the woman and immediately collapsed. The use of the dark side had sapped his energy. Ben scrambled to pick him up and barged out of the room.

Ben turned to the guard, who remained in the hallway. "Get the prisoner a medic."

Faron's eyes widened upon seeing Armitage unconscious. "Is he- is he alright?"

"I can take care of him, just help Captain Vora!" 

With that, Ben carried Armitage to a vacant room farther down the hall. There was nothing inside except for a few crates, one of which Ben used to prop up the general. By now it was dark outside, and Ben searched for a light switch. When he flicked it on, the lightbulb above them flickered before weakly illuminating the space. Ben crouched next to Armitage until he stirred.

Armitage's eyes shot open, and he immediately began gasping for air. When he noticed his proximity to Ben, he scrambled away to the opposite side of the cold, damp room. 

"Please, please don't get close to me!" Armitage pleaded. He held his face in his hands and curled up.

"Armitage-"

"Just don't," Armitage said weakly. "I can't trust myself not to hurt you."

Ben crouched to Armitage's level and slowly crawled over to him. "You won't."

"How do you know?"

"You'd never hurt me."

"At one point I would have done so without hesitation. How am I any different now?"

"Armitage, you've come so far. That was when you didn't know anything other than death. You've proven you're capable of so much more. And I know you are."

"But who's to say I won't go back to how I was before? You saw what I did. It was nothing but cruel."

"That wasn't really you. The dark side of the force is very good at exploring your doubts, and using them to trick you into thinking you need it as a crutch. The dark side can change people. But what you did doesn't reflect your character."

"How can you be sure?"

"Have you met me? I used to try so hard to constantly envelop myself with anger and hate. It was taxing. Once I realized it was making me into something I wasn't, I let it go. Do you ever worry that I might go on a murder spree?"

"No."

"And I wouldn't think that of you either. You are so much better than that."

"But what if I can't stop myself from doing that again?"

"I can help you. The dark side only has control if you let it. I'll teach you how to block it out. You're not in this alone."

"...Do you not hate me now?"

"Why would I hate you? You obviously feel bad about what you did. That alone proves that what you did does not reflect your heart. This is just an obstacle for you to overcome."

Armitage looked as if he wanted to cry, but was too exhausted and shocked to even attempt doing so. "I thought you'd- you'd leave me."

"No, never. We're going to get through this together."

For a moment, everything seemed to still as Armitage calmed down.

Ben spoke again. "Honestly, I don't blame you. That lady's an absolute piece of work. As someone with a history of anger issues, I can tell you it's not easy to keep your composure whenever she opens her mouth."

Armitage imagined a weak smile before becoming somber again. "Ben?"

"Yes?"

"Why were you in the prison?"

"I thought I'd come check on you, on a whim. In hindsight, I think the force wanted me to."

"How much did you hear?"

"Just a little." A brief pause. "What happened on Planet 64?"

"I'd rather not say."

"Oh. Okay. I trust you'll tell me when the time is right."

"You have a lot of nerve, putting any trust in me."

"And I don't regret it for a moment."

Without warning, Armitage slipped back into a heavy sleep. The toll the lighting took on him was more than expected. Ben sighed and smoothed a hand over his lover's forehead, brushing his mussed hair out of his face. Slowly, he lifted Armitage again and carried him through the darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I would also like to mention that I am taking requests for one shots here and on my tumblr, so if you would like me to write a little something, let me know. Requests can be anything from crack to angst to smut, so long as I am comfortable writing the requested subject. In addition to Kylux, I can write stuff regarding anything from the Skywalker Saga movies, as well as Jedi Fallen Order and The Old Republic.


	25. To my readers

First of all, I wanted to thank everyone who has taken the time to read my writing. This fanfic came a lot farther than I expected it to, and gained more support than I could have imagined. It is your encouragement that has led me to write this note, months after abandoning this story.

As this fic has continued, I had increasing difficulty with finding the motivation and ideas to write each chapter. I grew less satisfied with my work, and floundered around with trying to figure out what came next. Eventually, what used to be fun to me became a chore, only continuing to upload because I knew people were waiting for more. Then I just stopped.

After spending so long away from this piece, I have decided to rewrite it in its entirety. I plan on fixing pacing, character development and even major plot points to improve the fic as a whole. I am treating this version as a rough draft to reference as I rewrite. This is not the end of this story, but a chance at new life for it.

This will be the last addition to this work. I plan of having the first, reworked chapter of the improved version up within the next 24 hours. Past that, I will probably have no strict upload schedule. I felt that the looming deadlines and sense of urgency that came with committing to certain days added to the stress and rushed process of my writing. I hope you understand.

I have no idea when you'll see this message, if at all. But if you've read this, I hope you'll continue reading my work from here on out and look forward to the ongoing development of this timeline I've created.

Thanks fellow nerds. See you soon.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter. As of now I do not have a definite update schedule. I will of course update when I can, but my goal is weekly if possible.
> 
> On a side note, sometimes I will post little things related to this fanfic on my tumblr, galaxy-of-legends. So please check that out if you want a little bonus content!


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